What’s your style? Do you know exactly what your style is or is it ever-changing and evolving?
(Coastal Living)
I think for me, I have known my style is Traditional for a long time now. I’ve been drawn to that look over the years and still love it, although in the last few years, I’ve felt the need to de-formalize that Traditional style and make it a little less stuffy. My living room is going through a little tweaking now. It’s the most formal room in my house and even though I still love my furniture, I want to take it down a notch.
With the surge of decorating on the internet that has been going on for a long while now, it’s easy to get sucked into house envy. We see what everyone else has in their homes and I’m not so sure this habit we have of peeking in the windows of all our online friends is a completely healthy one. Fun, yes absolutely, but healthy, maybe not! 
(Traditional Home)
I dived into the online decorating world back in the late 90′s, when decorating boards like Better Homes & Gardens were going strong and were the place to hang out. There I met other obsessed home owners who wanted to talk about houses all the time and it was a lot of fun. I went on to join a private decorating group online in 2000 and from there, blogging took over and here I am.
I still remember the thrill of seeing other people’s house pics and sharing my own and the back and forth conversation that ensued with all of us back in those days. We lived for a new inspiring project from someone else. Now, it’s a little old hat. You can click on any blog and see house after house, style after style of as many differently decorated homes as you can imagine.
So, where am I going with this?
(My living room)
It seems that now that there is SO much out there to absorb and mull over with all the styles and visual overload, we can start to get dissatisfied with what we have. It becomes “oh my gosh, I love that, I want MY house to look like that!”.
We’ve seen the trends of the first decade of this century: Tuscan, French Country, Coastal cottage, Swedish inspired, and a host of others in between, especially the Pottery Barn phenom. I too, am not immune to falling in love with ALL of these looks at one time or another and I enjoy seeing them all. Does that mean I’m going to change out everything in my house and become a devotee of one of those styles?
Absolutely NO WAY!
I’ve carefully acquired and collected every single stick of furniture that’s in my house currently, one piece at a time and I still love every single stick of it. Whatever redecorating goes on at my house will consist of rugs, pillows, fabrics, accessories, and artwork changing out for the most part. You won’t see a whole lot of new furniture coming in my house. If something comes in, something has to go out.
So, as pretty as I think the current trend towards all white might be, it’s not going to happen at my house. I won’t be painting all of my pretty brown antiques white. Cause you see, brown is classic and never goes out of style. It might not be the cutting edge of design at the moment, but I love every single piece of those carefully chosen treasures.
We all have to do do what is right for each one of us when it comes to decorating our homes. I don’t live in a Tuscan home with architectural features to be envied, nor do I live in a stately old historical home with loads of character and patina. I live in a 10 year+ old subdivision and instead of wishing away everything that’s here, I have chosen to embrace my home and make it the best it can be.
I encourage all of you to do the same. It’s so easy to get caught up in blogland with what everyone else is doing, but you live in your home and I live in mine. So, that’s why on this blog, you will see me encouraging all of you to be yourselves, do what makes YOU happy in your home.
That’s how to truly make a house a HOME. A haven for our families. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to have a pretty house, in fact, I think women have that desire innately built in, but we all have budgets and limitations to what we can do. I can see a gorgeous home online and drool all over it, but at the end of the day, I live in my house and choose to make it what works best for my family and lifestyle. Be unique, don’t be afraid to do what makes you happy, even though it may fly in the face of current trends. Trends come and go, we all know that.
So, here’s what you won’t see in my house that is currently all the rage:
- All white slipcovered sofas and chairs, along with all white walls and minimal color (I do have one white slipcovered chair and ottoman that Grandma helped me with. The slipcover cost me $5 in yardsale fabric, labor was free). As pretty as this look is, it just won’t work in my house.
- Brick walls or floors, heavy wood beams, a home built with age. My house has limitations on what it can be. So, I live with what I have and make it the best it can possibly be.
(Babs Watkins, House Beautiful)
- All French inspired furniture and accessories. I love this look too, but I’m not going to get rid of everything I have to achieve it right down to the last detail. Practical rules for me.
(Christopher Petkanas, House Beautiful)
- Swedish design, all pale gray/green and minimal furnishings. Again, beautiful and I love to see it in magazines but it’s not me. I have to use what I already have and make it work.
- Sleek styling ala Pottery Barn, with minimal accessories. Again, I enjoy that look too, but much prefer my old antiques and I like my stuff too much to pare down that minimally.
So, how about you?
What do you truly love?
This pic below from House Beautiful probably speaks to me the loudest at this moment. But, will I totally have this look.
No, but I can get inspired from this pic. 
Do you fluctuate between styles trying to find the REAL you?
I’ve definitely honed in on my style much more as I’ve gotten older. I’ve become a bit of a snob when it comes to buying vintage things, I so prefer old to new and it’s a whole lot more fun to shop like that.
Does trolling blogs make it easier or harder for you to find your style?
If we’re not careful, we can definitely have house envy, myself included. I see SO many beautiful homes out there, but at the end of the day, I love my home so much and have the best time tweaking it and changing things around. I am truly grateful for our home. We have so many great ideas at our fingertips now, visual overload at times and it can make for some frustration and joy all at the same time.
So, here’s the bottom line on all of this. I urge you to be yourself, find joy in YOUR home and don’t get sucked into doing the latest and greatest in blogland. While there is certainly nothing wrong with getting inspiration and ideas from others in blogland, just be careful that you are going in a direction because YOU truly love it and not because it’s the thing to do this year. Copying might not be the best way to get the home of your dreams. Look, listen, and learn for yourself so that you can take the information you glean and use it in a positive way at your Home Sweet Home.
The End!
Thanks for stopping by! I'm Rhoda, from Atlanta, GA and I love decorating and DIY projects. Decorating a home doesn't have to cost a fortune and I've spent years thrifting at antiques markets and yardsales, finding those treasures that make a home unique. I'm here to inspire and encourage other women to find their own inner creativity. Won't you join me? 
{ 109 comments… read them below or add one }
Wonderful post……Your so right it is easy to get cought up in everyones style, but it is what makes YOU happy. I think we all need to read this! Thank you for being real.
Well said! I couldn’t agree more.
I have been working on my living room and came at it from that very approach. There are furniture pieces I want to replace but it will be as we find another to replace it with…not rushing out to buy a whole new set at a cost we just can’t afford. The accessories I have found are those that I love and have meaning.
I am not trendy. I love old wood. It is fine with me…as long as it is pretty and welcoming.
Becky K.
Love, love, love everything you said. I want a home that is layered through the years with comfy cozy pieces that create a welcoming haven for my family and friends. I love color too much to give it up…so my decorating isnt cutting edge. I love a bit of cheerful clutter and a home that looks lived in. Thanks for inspiring me to remain true to myself and my family and to use the blogs and catalogs to stir my creative juices when things get a bit stale.
Good Morning Rhoda,
I agree with everything that you are saying. My style is very eclectic, so I choose to very selective of things that I add to my home decor. I do like to change out accessories, rugs and window treatments from time to time, but furniture, no.
I have found too, that as I have gotten older that I gravitate to the vintage and older pieces that have been lovingly worn.
Yes, I do ooh and ahh over all the homes in blogland and I feel inspired and often use some of the ideas I see. But, I try not to get caught up in the current trends.
hugs
Sissie
Great post and I totally agree with what you say. My “time worn style” is a bit of everything. At the moment I am loving roses mixed with industrial pieces. I do love seeing whats happening via blog hopping but in the end I work with the pieces that I love the best and mix them all together. Some may think its not great and not to their taste but I feel I am being true to me and thats what its all about :0)
alicia
time worn style
WONDERFUL post! I have followed your blog for a long time and I think this is the best post yet. I have been feeling the house envy greatly these past few months. wishing everything was white, knowing it could not work in my home and then wondering what to do next. This post has really been inspiring for me.
Thanks!
Rhoda, you are so right about trends coming and going. My home is definitely traditional, but casual. I have been making mine more and more casual, too. I took the test on sproost.com last week and it said my style is 33% Traditional country, 33% Nantuckett, and 34% wine country. That is probably the truth. I enjoy looking at blogs to be inspired and to maybe look at something and get an idea of a form of it or how to make or paint something myself to copy the higher end look on a budget. It amazes me what some of these ladies can do with paint and/or fabric.
I totally agree with you! This was a great reminder post. :0) I actually do like looking through the home blogs because they open my eyes to things I may not have thought of on my own. What I have actually taken away from all of the design blogs out there is this; whatever makes YOU happy and works for YOUR LIFESTYLE is what is IN. I love the ideas I get from blogs. I am definitely no designer – just a wife and mom who wants my home to be a place that makes my family and friends feel comfortable and embraced. I decorate very practically. I love pieces that I can pick up for a song at a thrift store. I don’t feel that they are too precious to be used and loved. I think that makes a house into a home.
rhoda,
this is a great article! to answer your question, blogland has completely helped me refine and enhance my stlye! i was a “pick up something because its cute and not know what to do with it at home” kind of girl before blogging.
by perusing so many blogs and designs i have found what i am truly drawn to and my doing so can now easily pass up really cute things at a store or flea market because now i KNOW what i like
and what fits my style!
Thank you for this morning post. I have been reading your blog for about 8 months and enjoy it so much. Your post this am rang very true with me. We have recently downsized from a large 150 year old Georgian home to suburb home. The upkeep on the grand dame was getting so timecomsuiming. I am having fun blendly my traditional pieces into our new home. Your blog especialy today reinforces my decisions. Again thanks for your comments.
Thanks Rhoda! I agree with you. I am also a traditional gal and find it somewhat painful to see someone paint over a great antique piece. But, once the painting is done the finished look is always fantastic, I just don’t think that is for me.
Also, I love, love, love the very first picture you posted with the red buffalo check curtains and the red toile wingback chairs. I have actually been contemplating using red buffalo check on my kitchen bay window for sometime now. You have just sealed the deal for me! Thanks for a great post and a splash of reality.
I don’t comment to often but this was a great post Rhoda…thank’s
Great post, Rhoda!
The entry photo speaks to me, as well. I have almost all the ingredients to replicate that look in our foyer, except our stairway is in the living room. However, I won’t try to replicate it.
We are playing musical furniture again, at our house. Brightening and lightening J’s lodge. No furniture purchases, just paint and borrowing from other rooms. At the same time we’re taking from the lodge to use in other rooms. I want my “office” upstairs, now. We tossed around the idea of turning the studio or dining room into an office. But, where would we use my mother’s cabinet and the beautiful round table and slipcovered chairs. I’m not ready to give all that up or the room. Speaking of Mother’s cabinet, it has remained the same , since it was put together over 80 years ago. Why would I paint that cabinet white with all that beautiful vaneer work. It’s the first thing people see when they enter our home. No white paint for that old girl. In the end, I’m bringing my spanking new PC, into the master suite. Oh the horrors! I’ve heard that is a decorating mistake, but it works for us and as you say, this is our home/sanctuary.
Changes being made at Pat & J’s casa, with few purchases. And if their are furniture purchases it will be some of that “old stuff”.:-)
It’s really easy to get sucked into the popular idea or what is “in” at the moment. I don’t think I’ve ever had house envy, but I do admire what others do in their homes and have picked up some wonderful ideas over the past 8 or 10 years of online house browsing. Many ideas learned from you, Rhoda. I can see where “house browsing” can become unhealthy, though. I try to keep a clear head.
Wonderful post! I do think this is related to age somewhat. I think that when we are younger we want to fill our homes with “stuff” that other people say we should have. Blogs, magazines, HGTV, etc. all fuel this need to conform, but as we age I think we find ourselves, both in decorating and in other ways and we hone in on our style and what makes “us” happy. We find those pieces that really speak to us and how we really live, not how we want or think we should live. And I think our homes become more of a reflection of who we are rather than a reflection of trends and what’s hot at the moment. I know this was the case for me, and although I do know of some people who find their style very early on I think those people are somewhat rare. I found hints of my style early on, and those furnishings are still with me today, but now that I’m in my 40′s, I have found “my” style.
Kat
I guess you could say Ikea with alittle Pottery Barn through in.
Rhoda, well said! That is a great post and a wonderful reminder. I don’t mind painting accessories black or white, but my hand stops and shakes with a brush in hand at the thought of painting beautiful patina that tooks years to look that way. I, too, love the white, but when it goes out of style, do I want to strip off what I’ve painted – Yikes! No! Linda
Hi Rhoda, I tend to like everything that has a ‘pair’… I’m always looking for things that match not knowing exactly what my style is, I’m thinking a mix and eclectic style because I also love all things French, Shabby, Contemporary, Vintage, Tuscan, Beachy, well you get the idea
My dream is to combined all of this things I adore in just one room. Working on it… Great post!
Excellent! I have never been caught up in the trends of decorating …just walk in the house and see
. It overwhelms me to just think about it. I probably need to hire you to come and update our home anyway 
. I think our homes need to be warm and inviting, clean and fresh smelling. If we stress over the contents of it, often times we won’t invite people in. Doesn’t that defeat the purpose??
Thank you for this thoughtful, insightful post. I can imagine it was a lot of work to put together, and I appreciate that.
Rhoda, you are so right! Very well said and oh so true. Thank you, as always, for inspiring and motivating us — and especially teaching us to be happy with what we have and to make the best of it.
Beautifully said
. You know I struggle with this and as I find my taste evolving I am trying to be ever mindful of who I am in the midst of my decorating. And MOST importantly that my identity is not wrapped up in my blog or style. It’s ultimately in Him…which can also get lost in blog addiction land.
Very well put Rhoda, I couldn’t agree more. As you know, my house can’t support the new “in” styles either. Sure, I could paint my woodwork white, but why would I want to take the charm and character from a home built in 1920 with wood forested in the early 1900′s? Why would I conceal the detailed craftsmanship of the flooring and mouldings with tile or brick? And how much leverage do you really have with white slipcovers when it comes to change? They remind me of summer all the time. Fine if you live in a warm climate – but when temps drop below zero here in NY, and snow blankets every outside surface, I love curling up on my warm sage sofa, atop my colorful turkish rugs; my favorite books on my rustic old cart turned table and enjoying a nice glass of wine. I love your house, and love even more that through the movement to more lighter and gustavian/swedish/french design – you’ve stayed true to yourself and as inspiring as any of those homes with white slips and seagrass!
Loved this post…all good practical advice. I can tell it came from someone who is comfortable in her own “skin” and home.
Even though they are lovely now, I’m just wondering how these all white homes are going to look in a few years. I just can’t imagine the anxiety of living in white. It would mean no more red wine for me!
Hi there! Thank you so much for posting this. I have been suffering from a mini case of house blog envy! I agree with you in that it is very important to work with the elements in your home rather than try to change it. I have a huge rock wall and floor to ceiling windows in my family room. Although sometimes I wish they were not there (they are hard to decorate around) I chose to work with them, rather than against them. And I also love my antique furniture pieces and wouldn’t paint them white for anything in the world!
Amazing post! I agree—I think as homeowners we get mixed up with what we like NOW and who we truly are. If we go all out in a specific trendy style, it might be appealing today, and maybe even all year. But what about next year, when the slipcover fad changes from white to teal? Or those exposed ceiling beams just aren’t “in” anymore? Most of us can’t afford to remodel according to popularity on an annual basis. Great point on being true to who you are, but not being afraid to add little pieces from different genres to tie it in with what you’ve already got going! Great!
Great post, Rhoda! I get lots of inspiration from all of the blogs out there but then I do my own take on things. I can’t do the all white thing either. I do love it though.
Great post, Rhoda! I also suffer from some degree of house envy…all that lovely creamy white and chippy old accessories! But at my house…that would be a disaster! Can you say…cat hair?? lol It’s so funny that you have posted this because my friend Linda and I have this conversation almost every time we are together! How nice to see that we are not alone! And…I stand with you on keeping my own style! Happy week!…hugs…Debbie
Rhoda,
Thank you for such a wonderful post! You hit the nail on the head with this one!
“Grow where you are planted” is a favorite saying of mine. You seem to have done just that and encouraged each of us to do the same.
God bless…
Natalie
Very thoughtful entry. I struggle with not only ensuring my home design stays true to me (and my budget), but also that it encompasses my blended family and doesn’t monopolize my limited time resources. I too am a traditional girl and have been recently trying to evict mass produced decor from my living space. I try to balnance that by forcing myself to slow down sometimes to make room for the other priorities in my life. That is a tall order, but one day at a time it is possible. http://www.containchaos.com
Very practical post. A good reminder to be thankful for what we have and do the best with what we have! Thanks!
Do I know my style? NO
Lol!
We just recently bought our first home and I am still trying to figure out exactly what it IS I really like as far as style. I have searched through so many blogs and sites and have found so much inspiration but it is so scattered all over the place.
It’s going to take me awhile to get this house together, that’s for sure.
I agree with everything you have said but I will say that if there is a style out there that is trendy–I might try it in a smaller area in my house. For instance, I am moving in about 2 weeks to a new house and there is a computer niche that I would like to do in something a little bit more current right now while the rest of my house is very traditional. I am not selling off everything I have to jump on the trend wagon but I do think you can incorporate it on a smaller scale.
Very thoughtful post, thank you. I have to say my style is still evolving. I never thought I would be in my house for almost 7 years and still have so many spaces that aren’t decorated, but here I am.
I have to say I chuckled when you mentioned all the home blogs out there, it seems that one idea takes off and soon every where I look there it is, whether it’s all white, or burlap everything, definitely inspires me to go a different direcation! Especially since I prefer ‘pre-owned’ furniture and decor. I can’t say antique, since I can’t afford that!
Great post Rhoda! I so agree with your points. I love making our home – ours. I am not one to jump on themes or trends. We, too are a bit traditional, though not formal at all. A little bit country cottagely thrown in. I have several items from my grandmother and great grandmother and a good many antiques throughout our home. My hubby antiques right along with me and these are the things that we choose to have in our home – the things that we love!
I will not be jumping on the neutrals, the white slipcovers, the beachy look, etc. because it is just not us. I love the slipcovered look and actually toyed with it for our sunroom, but have decided it is just not for us. As beautiful as I think it is.
I LOVE looking at blogs for ideas, and just for seeing pretty pictures. I am not one to want what others have, I have always followed *the beat of a different drummer* so to speak. LOL. But it is nice to see how others decorate, to share ideas, etc. It is not nice to get obsessed over it. Too many other fun things in life!
tina
After two years of “wrestling” with how to decorate our home, I finally feel we have fallen into our style. The reason I say “we” is because it is a perfect blend of our personalities and the accidental fruit of our fun-filled, junkin’ Saturdays. Other people may think it is absolutely odd or funky, but we feel comfortable and realxed now. It’s like we have dressed our house in an old pair of worn-out jeans and a favorite t-shirt from high school!
Amen, sister!
When I fist got married, my hubby and I had nothing but the bare bones of our apartment. Instead of going out like all of our friends and purchasing sets of furniture to fill the space, we picked each item in our home with thought and consideration. Nothing matches. Nothing was purchased as a set. I love it! It’s me, and not a designer or a store…
P.S. I’m having a little giveaway on my little blog, and I’d love if you have a chance to stop by!
I couldn’t agree more!!! I go through spells of house envy too. It is then that I work on me concentrating on how blessed I am. It is not a large home but I love it. Fads do come and go. I remind myself of how guests always are complimenting my decor. My niece says it is so homey and cozy and LOVES visiting. That to me is the best compliment ever! Usually if I just change around an accessory or two and it nips the “I’m so tired of my house” feeling.
I don’t know that I have any one particular style going on in my house. I do have a white slipcovered sofa that I got done earlier this year, but I’ve been wanting one for awhile and finally had some money to put toward that. I like lots of different styles ~ some are French, some are more transitional {where it’s got a traditional look with a more contemporary flair}. The only thing I won’t do is modern or using steel/metals {unless they are drapery rods!}.
I don’t like sparse, but I like simple and uncluttered as far as accessories. I like using things that I love looking at every single day. But I also flip, and like ruffles and trims on chairs and window treatments.
Thanks for this real life lesson.
I once heard a story; a couple is house hunting, there house is up for sale as well. They read a listing describing all the
wonderful attributes this particular house has to offer, so a time is set to see this wonderful house – and it turned out to be the house they themselves put on the market.
Sometime as Carly Simon says in one of her oldie-golidie great songs, we just need to take a new picture of our own
backyard – and be grateful – we all are some of the richest people in the world. And it doesn’t come from having the
newest or the trendiest. This is Holy Week – enough said.
As a newer blogger (just over a month), I NEEDED to read this today. Thank you so much for keeping me grounded. This was an awesome post.
You read my mind today Rhoda. Maybe it’s the spring weather but I told Twin the other day I sometimes wish I could get rid of 75% of my things and start over! I think it’s because of all the clean white I see online and in the mags. I’m just going to do some painting and tweaking instead and I’m sure I’ll be happy.
Amen, Rhonda! I love to browse all the design/decorating blogs but have to remind myself that, although I see many beautiful styles, homes, and rooms out there, not all of them fit my family’s lifestyle. I’ll never forget the look on the saleswoman’s face when I told her I needed a couch the color of dirt because I had three kids and two dogs (I dream of having at least one piece of slipcovered furniture someday!). Your home is gorgeous, and I love the way you take a little of one style and a little of another and make them your own.
Well said Rhoda! When i first started reading all of these blogs last fall I found myself having some major house envy. But luckily I didn’t rush out and change things to fit all the beautiful things I saw. It past and I know that really I can have a combination of the things I love and the things I see. I love the last picture you posted because for me it’s a combination. I love the old warn patina of wood that has been loved over the years. But I also love painted pieces. So, it doesn’t have to be all or nothing. I choose what I LOVE. If it doesn’t make me happy, it doesn’t stay. I have gotten much pickier as I get older. But that is how it becomes your own style.
Wow! Thanks so much for the encouragement. I am on a very strict budget. Everything must be almost free because I desparately want to pay off this morgage to be debt free. Yet I so want a beautiful home. Thank you for the reminder to be the best I can be in my home in my circumstances.
Great post! I still love to browse the blogs, but I have never had house envy.. still have many of the same hand-me-downs from
my first apartment decades ago… and would not have it any other way. I am with you… a few tweaks, some paint and I am good to go. I do have slipcovers, but have had those for years… love them.. thanks for the post.
Hi Rhoda,
Enjoyed and appreciated this post, and it’s such an important point you make about crossing the line between “peeking in windows” and comparing homes to the point of dissatifaction with what we currently have in our own homes. We may find ourselves in the uncomfortable position of envy. It’s that envy that can make us unappreciative of what we have and muddies the waters of one’s own true style. I try to keep my focus on what I love, as you said, and what “feels right” to me. I consider beautiful homes, such as yours, a great source of inspiration. Coincidentally, I always go back to Traditional (though I have eclectic elements of cottage and farmhouse) and am also a Thrifter (for 2 decades!) so I have unique pieces that create a one of a kind home. More than a look or a style, I strive to create a feeling of warmth and invitation. This is what you have done so well! I assume your home to be a reflection of the type of person you are: energetic, interesting, layered, traditional, colorful, reliable, but not predictable, warm and inviting, but also with a modern edge of style (without being too deeply seduced in to current trends). I recently had a visitor who just spontaneously said, upon walking into my front living room, “Oh, can I cozy up on your couch for the day?” That’s how I want folks to feel, and I imagine that’s how people feel when they visit your home. ***My take-home- biscuit (tip of the day) when buying anything for my home, especially large purchases, is to answer, with a Yes, this question: “Is it timeless and does it speak to me?”*** In summary, I like to keep my mind focused on keeping a home that nutures my family & friends, but may or may not impress others. Kudos and compliments are nice, but not the goal. I just reiterated everything you said, in my own words. Hah! Again, thanks for this post. And the inspiration. I love that you have your decorating feet on the ground! Kind regards & many blessings to you, Rhoda. ~Angie, a daily reader.
Well said! I lean more toward traditional, although I did redo my keeping room recently with white slipcovers (accessories still fall under traditional category). We are moving this summer and I get to start from a fairly blank slate because we need new furniture anyway. Where will I end up? Probably back to traditional. IMO, it is timeless. But most importantly, it feels like home to me!
What wonderful good advice. You are a wise lady.
This is probably one of the best post that I have read in a very long time. Thanks for encouraging us to not get caught up in the house envy, and do what works for us. I agree that it is so easy to get caught up in that. I wanted to slipcover all my furniture to get that look in the picture, but at the end of the day, all white furniture in a house with two young children, a dog and two cats would never work.
I have always felt that my style was a country classic look, or country modern.. I dont know what you would call it I guess. Either way, it is what it is, and my house would never work with beams or concrete floors either.
Bravo Miss Rhoda!! I so agree and that is exactly my philosophy. I have never been a trendy girl in fact I usually run the other way. I like a variety of styles and I too change with pillows, art,lamps etc. By time the general public picks up on a design trend the design world has already moved on so we are already OUT before we ever get IN,hehe. I have a couple of exercises on my blog that I have had clients do to find what they really like. One is to write down likes and dislikes and the other is to get out 5 articles that you LOVE and have had for more than 3-5 yrs and make a vignette. It is pretty telling when you are honest with yourself what you really love. Great post and thought provoking, You are one of the blog Queens, xo Kathysue
I felt compelled to comment on your post today. I am new to blogland. I just started my own family one last May. I am considered a “lurker”, I guess, since I only comment on blogs of family and friends and never on the blogs that I enjoy for my own “guillty pleasure”. However, your post today struck a chord with me. We moved into our new home 3 1/2 years ago, and I will admit I am just now allowing myself to find “my style”. Our previous home was so small, I knew we weren’t staying there and we didn’t have the means to really do much with it, so I waited, on everything. I felt a little overwhelmed with so much house to finally do something with and pretty much a blank canvas to start with. I had a few gut instincts for the house from the beginning but kind of ignored them for fear that I would mess it up. At first I rushed to make it a home, then I called in some help, it provided me with direction at the time. However, the whole time I was working the plan she gave me I felt I was moving further away from what I really wanted. I am happy to report that the last year or so I have been saying to myself “forget everyone else, I have always wanted this room yellow, so yellow it shall be. Or I have always wanted a rusty red on this wall so it shall be.” I am LOVING it! During this time I have also found a plethora of home design blogs. While they have been helpful in a lot of ways, I admit to feeling the pull to go one way or another when I see the beautilful homes. I also felt like I was off kilter with the rest of the world because I keep adding color throughout the house while it seems the rest of the world is going with blue, gray, and white everywhere. While I enjoy it in blogland I know that if I tried that in my home I would be bored to tears before even being done implementing the plan. Is it possible to even have a style? I love the Ballard design, Pottery Barn looks, but I also have a dash of an oriental flavoring appearing here and there in my home, not to mention Tuscan and I am sure a hundred different influences. I am hoping it will be beautiful together and not look mod podged together. Anyhow, I am rambling. I just wanted to let you know that I have enjoyed reading your blog the last month or two or three, and that you were right on this morning. Make your home yours and love every minute of it. That is what I am still trying to do.
Thanks,
Ronda
Very nicely said, Rhoda. We all just need to decorate in the way that makes our home happy. I tweek mine all the time, although I lean very heavily on the traditional side, and probably always will. It’s also fun to add a totally unexpected piece in every now and then. It makes your guests say, “What were you thinking!!??”
Thank you for this post. I love a lot of differnt looks also but I buy what I like when it comes down to it. I just did a post on the new white look. Although it is nice we are all going to get sick of it soon!! It is very beachy which I love but not with 3 kids and a dog. I just pick a few new things each season or two and add it with what I like. Buy what you like and you can’t go wrong. I had the same picture in my blog post the one that is so trendy. Love you girl!!
Wonderful post! As someone with organgy wood stained mouldings and interior doors (instead of that gorgeous white I see on most blog homes), I couldn’t agree more.
I find that viewing house blogs makes me more aware of my decorating style (which I cannot define). I prefer blogs featuring decorating styles similar to my own. While I appreciate the lots fo white, cottage/beachy, shabby chic styles, that are just not for me and my family. So,while I’ll occasionally check a blog with this type of decorating style out, it’s not often.
Thank you for this post. I have found myself trying to copy different rooms on some blogs. Just a couple of days ago I realized this and even mentioned to my husband that by the time I got done doing what “so and so” had done in their homes, they had already changed theirs. Light Bulb moment!! Try to be myself! I have learned lots of DIY things, which I enjoy, though.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I needed to hear that. I love getting ideas for using what I have but I don’t want to envy people’s things. Happy Easter!!
Absolutely! I couldn’t agree with you more. My style is actually very similar to yours…to me it’s Southern Living style. I’ve liked this look for many years. We buy quality furniture and we keep it. (The doggone four poster bed that I’m over will probably go to my grave with me.)
I too have found that I get a pretty good case of house envy sometimes. Then I walk back through and feel happy and surrounded by beautiful things I love. What more could you want?
Great post, Rhoda!! I SO needed to hear this right now. I’ve been sitting in a holding pattern with my house on the market for nearly two years now. I’m so disgusted with it all, but I know that once I am able to pull all my gorgeous stuff back out of storage that I will love it again, and it will all be new and fun and exciting redecorating with it all. I am very much a french country traditionalist. There are times that I’m envious of the cottage chic look, but I know it’s not practical for me at all with a 2 year old. Maybe I’ll pick one room and make it a cottage haven.
Laundry rooms seem to be a good place for that. hehe
THANK YOU, Rhoda.
I loved this post…I’m gonna feature it on Friday, as a matter of fact. 
My first experience online was on the Southern Living message boards back in 2001 or so. That eventually led me to blogging, but you are right…it is SO easy to be envious of others’ creativity instead of being inspired to do it your way and be you. 
Thanks for the encouragement. 
Perfectly said!! No all white for me EVER! I love color! Thanks for sharing this. It is so true!
Thank you for this post. I am pretty new to reading blogs and very new to writing one of my own. I have collected “old”, sometimes antique furniture for several years, over 30 actually. My husband and I call our decor “early yard sale” style. I have enjoyed sewing curtains, pillows, tablecloths and making and painting many things to make our house our home. I will stick to that but enjoy finding new ideas to spruce things up by reading blogs. Thank you so much for the encouraging post.
Thank you so much for expressing a thought that was nagging at me…
After visiting so many beautiful homes I too began suffering from home envy…I live on a ranch in a Mexican style ranch hacienda home…rustic…and I am a true Victorian cottage style lady…I was so busy crying over not being able to enjoy the charm of the white picket fence and all that sweetness…
Well, I finally slapped myself into the real world..and started to apply a Rustic Victorian decor…and voila…I was redeemed!!!!…I love it and everyone that comes to visit and stay with house feel like they are staying in a Bed and Breakfast..with very antique vintage style…I am so happy now and confident…
Your blog today just cinched it for me and I found myself tearing up with joy…you put my feelings into words…thank you…
Hugs,
Oma
oh well so much for editing…lol…but I was so excited in responding…lol…
Great post Rhoda!! I’m just not liking the whole white thing…sorta puts me in mind of an insane aylum.
Your style, however, is likable. Your home is gorgeous! I don’t envy what you have…just love looking at it and developing some really great ideas of my own! I am very thankful for what God has allowed my family and I to acquire over the years and just really enjoy dillying with it and changing things out occassionally.
Have a BLESSED Easter!!
Trolling blogs, as you so aptly put it, has given me tons of inspiration and has actually helped me find what is best for my house. I have a limited budget, which is probably good, that means I am never tempted to sell everything and buy another style altogether. I have to work with what I have already. I try to let my house speak to me, telling me what it best for it. I know that sounds wierd, but it has worked for me in every house I have tried to decorate. Great post, and I totally agree with you! My home is ME and my hubby, and it reflects US. Hugs, Cindy S
I truly like my house and what I’ve done with it over the years, but sometimes after looking at blogs I feel like what I’ve done is not good enough or out of date. Like you, I could never do the all white thing or paint any of my fine wood antiques. Thanks for reminding us to enjoy what we’ve got and who we are!
I don’t have a style! lol The design/style gene skipped me. I like blue and that’s what I try to match everything too!! lol
Hello Rhoda
As always a great post. Thanks for the inspiration. Loved all the styles and feel like redecorating again!
Your blog was our first inspiration in the blogging world, and we would like to invite you to participate in our first giveaway.
Cheers!
Kinga from Blueloom
Good points were made in your post today. We each have very individual likes, dislikes, and gut instincts about what is right for us – - and we should listen to OURSELVES. I’m currently a bit out-of-step with what is fashionable, and have absolutely no intention of painting my vintage oak cabinets and the matching wainscoating white in my kitchen! : )
I found that when I was house hunting last year, I was completely tired of seeing the same floor plans in every house. The same granite. The same jet tub. The same tile. The same breakfast bar. When I walked into the home we bought, it audibly spoke to me – - “Buy me!” – - because it had features most people don’t want today. But it was absolutely perfect for the furniture and accessories I had spent a lifetime collecting. We had only to buy a sofa and foyer table. We will do some minor refurb in the next few years, but it suits us . . . and because it does, everyone thinks it’s a beautiful home. Even without the granite counters and stainless appliances so de rigueur these days. Oh, and we insist on color in our house, too.
Sometimes I wonder, why do we have to have a decorating style that someone else defines? Why isnt my “style” actually one? We all love many things and we are all different and yet the powers that be try to put us in catagories. I love the painted furniture Im seeing….the pretty white pieces and creamy colors and such… but I think Id get bored looking at that all the time. I dont like tons of color but I do like color.
I love my oak pieces, they are not old but collected carefully over the yrs. And sometimes I imagine them painting white and I know they would look stunning. But then why do that when I purposely bought good solid oak? And what happens when I get tired of white paint and want my oak back?
I like antiques too and doggoneit every time I start to collect something it becomes popular and expense so I stop collecting then. And sometimes I like the new decorating things. I like the cottage beachy look too……so how does one person get to have all they want? So I think you have no choice but to put things in your home that you love….since you may not be able to afford to replace them. And dont stick to any particular style because some say you should. I believe your home should reflect you, not some decorator or trend.
I do enjoy looking into others’ homes. I get some great ideas, but no, I I hope don’t get envious. I take an idea here or there, or change an arrangement around a bit, but I’m happiest when my house reflects me. Good food for thought.
Great post. I love getting ideas from you and others such as picture frame molding and corbels in the archway. All from you. However, my home reflects my taste, be it thrifty, antique,sentimental and yard sale make-overs. I can’t waist my time being envious of some of the lovely homes I view on blogland. I look for ideas to shop in my home and rearrange “stuff”.
I really enjoyed this post. I have very eclectic tastes, which makes it difficult to see all the ideas on the blogs. I’m attracted to so much, however I know the style of house I have and work with it.
I Love reading many blogs, because I appreciate creative ideas, however there is a glut of shabby chic white+pink and white+blue. It’s always refreshing to see other styles.
~elaine~
I LOVE this post! This is exactly what I am trying to acheive in my house. I don’t want to redecorate every 5 years cause it’s out of style now. I like the traditional. I want to fill it with classic and timeless pieces. I have really thought of the limitations of my family too. I love the white look, but I love color too. We are too messy for white anyways. Fragile pieces don’t work well for us either. Or cluttered tables. My kids are experts at creating clutter! The advice in this article is great! Finally, someone has given me the ok to be ourselves!
Dear Rhoda, I’ve been following your blog for a few months now, and I want to say “Hear, hear!” (or however you spell that!) to your article today. I live in a small home (605 square feet with 392 detached additional feet–it’s a long story) and it’s VERY easy for me to get house envy. But I am TRYING to be content with what God has provided. Our styles are very different (mine is garden cottage) but I like what you have to say and how you say it. Thanks for your encouragement and reminders.
Have a blessed Easter,
Marilyn
While I enjoy looking at everyone’s houses, I have never been envious. Sure, toward the end of the 19 years we lived in a small, older home in PA, I wished we could move, or had the money to do a ton of work, but I always am grateful for what I have. I know many women who have never owned a home, or live in areas that are not so great. My house would have been their dream.
Moving to my dream home last fall (a small, but brand new home), has been an amazing experience. I appreciated it a lot more than I would have when I was younger. Armed with ideas from your blog, I am ready to turn this place into a showplace.
Hi Rhoda,
You hit the nail on the head with today’s post. Even though I’ve always enjoyed home decorating magazines, I always felt they were more geared towards the rich and wealthy. However, when I found my first online decorating blog I was thrilled. This is where I found ladies who were very much like myself, they lived on regular incomes and in homes that weren’t mansions. I was also thrilled with how everyone was so willing to share their ideas, diy projects, thrifty makeovers etc.
With that being said, I must admit to falling into the trap of trying to copy certain styles only to find myself strolling through store after store to try and put something similar together. I often questioned why I was doing this and why I just did stay true to my own style.
I still visit my fave blogs every day (of which yours is one of my first stops) because I enjoy seeing what everyone is up to and there is always something that catches my eye. Keep up the great work and TFS! Sheila
I really enjoyed looking at all those styles. thanks
Excellent post, Rhoda! It’s so easy to want everything you see, love every new thing, but will we still love it next year? A home should reflect who we are and what we truly love, and we may tweak things from time to time. I think, though, that if you love your basic pieces, you will never become dissatisfied with them. I believe that in a few years, people will say “why did someone ever paint this nice wood!”. Better to not be too quick to jump on every bandwagon.
It IS easy to get caught up in what everyone else is doing and to want to try everything you see that is pretty. But you are right that we each need to look at what we have and can do and be content. I am still discovering my style having only had my own house for 8 months! And it’s been fun as the only thing in the budget so far has been paint in a few rooms. So I have to take my time, be creative and thrifty. I’ve mostly enjoyed looking at pictures online to get ideas and see what I like to look at.
Words have never rang more true to me! You are right on the money! I love looking at decorating blogs too, and I have been inspired by many of them to try new things or to get out the spray paint. I really don’t have the time, energy or money to copy rooms and honestly, I want rooms to function for MY family and not someone elses. You know what I really love about a house that I visit or see online… rooms or homes that really shine with love and integrity…homes that truely represent the people who live there. That’s what makes a room shine for me.
Rhoda,
I didn’t take the time to read all the comments. This is one of the best posts you have written. Thank you! I spent too much of my early married life trying to make my home what someone else thought it should be. Finally, I grew up and my husband and I developed our own style. We enjoy it and really don’t care if others don’t like it. My husband jokes that the only way we will get rid of our antiques is when somebody rips them apart so we can be buried in them. Seriously, great, great advice. You rocked it!
You’re absolutely right. Good design can be achieved within any style, and that should be the goal. A home should always reflect the people who live there….never the signature of a designer. I may not be able to photography every home that I give design help to, but if my client is happy, that’s the ultimate. You are very wise to know yourself and your family well enough to make design decisions that reflect you.
p.s……I can’t live with all that white either!!!!
I agree that it is so easy to be caught up in what everyone else has or what the latest trends are. I have always had a classic style. I dabbled in fads when I first married (americana…blech!) and decided quickly that they weren’t for me. I like practical, functional, and beautiful things. My home is a mix of family pieces (like the 110 year old rocking chair that belonged to my great-grandparents) and new furniture that we saved and saved for. I love to change up color and fabric, but our home never goes out of fashion. Being content is this day and time is hard as everyone wants to be equal with their neighbors, even virtual ones. Even with contentment the reminder to be true to yourself is a valuable lesson!
Amen!
I am so glad you wrote this. I was beginning to think the all white cottage style was taking over blog land and that’s all anyone wants. I like that look but can not identify with it at all. All white is no fun! I used to follow trends and when I was done with a room I was never satisfied because it wasn’t me. I recently got rid of everything I didn’t like or that I purchased just because it was the it thing of the moment. I have started adding things that reflect me. I am so much more happier with my home now. I will never follow trends again. Classic, timeless decorating will always work in a home even 50 years from now.
Rhoda….I love this post because I am one that struggles with a style and completing it. I love your and other decorating blogs and admire you all as you repaint, garage sale shop and find the neatest things to call your own. I am finally figuring out that I need to put a little bit of who I am in my home and don’t try to make it a perfectly decorated space. I love my home and it will always be a work in progress.
Again…I appreciate you for the simple ways you show us how to do projects if we want to. I need that because I don’t seem to have that creative gene like one of your other commenters stated either. I need you!!!
Love ya, Connie
Thank you ALL for chiming in on this one! I figured it would strike a chord & it sure did. I enjoyed ready every single one of your comments & am happy that you identified with what I was saying here. Just something for us all to keep in mind in this blogging world. Thanks y’all, for the comments, I loved them!!
Love this Rhoda!! I was planning almost the exact same post. I am more traditional like you and I don’t think that will ever go out of style!! You said it all so well.
i just had to comment on this inspiring post. i find it hard sometimes to look at other blogs and see the decorating talent out there, or to think that my little house is lacking b/c i can’t decorate a mantel that i don’t have. yes, i hope to see comments on my posts, but i also realize that my style is my style. i am not going to decorate in a way that isn’t me just to fit in with what other people are decorating. i might make something work tweaked with my style. thank you for explaining that that’s ok. sometimes we need this time of encouragement, even if it’s from people we don’t know personally. so thank you. really.
This is a great post! I have to admit that I’m one of those white slip-covered sofa people – I wasn’t always but about 10 years back, I thought I’d give it a try. I wasn’t sure it was going to work for us since we also had a dog who lived on the sofa so muddy paws were inevitable. But to be honest, it really works for us. No other upholstery can live up to the wear and tear those slipcovers get but it’s a simple run through the washer and it’s good as new. I love the freshness of them. I think tastes evolve as we get older – from college hand-me-downs to first home budget pieces to more traditional pieces as we mature. I’ve certainly gone through this in the 20 years I”ve been married and I’ve also had a husband to consider who also has tastes and I wouldn’t want to force my likes and dislikes on anyone else. I’ve never really gone with whatever the current trend is – just what we like and feel comfortable with. I’ve enjoyed collecting pieces in our travels and have a true appreciation for vintage pieces and reproductions. So even though we may have white slipcovers, they marry well with all the other pieces we’ve acquired and they keep our home from feeling dated. Our home reflects our personality which is one of the first things people comment on when they visit. It doesn’t look like a showhome -it’s a well used family home. Blogs are great inspiration and I think often people think that the look has to be replicated completely, when actually it could just be one item in a photograph that can provide inspiration. Our homes are our sanctuaries and should reflect who we are and not what someone wants or expects us to be.
I’m grateful for what I have – but I still have a little house envy when I look at yours. I find it inspiring though! I love finding a treasure for nothing and I guess that is why I love your blog so much. Although I don’t like all styles for myself, I can appreciate them in other peoples homes.
Thank you for this post! I just commented on your friends house and I have reds, greens, and tan with some black pieces of furniture. I see all of these rooms that are neutral or white and while I love them, they are not me. I don’t really go for all the trends. I stay towards traditional and add a touch of whimsy to it. I have had the same red fabric for about 9 years and I love it still to this day. I had pillows and then I found the fabric and had curtains made and am using them in our new home. I feel as you do. The pictures are nice and we can swoon over them but I am not jumping on the bandwagon:)
Oh, what great insight Rhoda ! I love how you encourage us all to find our own personal style and stick with it. You know, the thing I love about other’s blogs is that I get to peek into THEIR style and THEIR personality, and that’s why I visit. If we all had white homes with white slipcovers everywhere (not that I don’t love that look !) then how boring would this blog hopping be ? I get inspired by everyone else’s style, but I’m one who will stay true to my own style which is just a mix of elegant and eclectic, traditional and modern, formal and casual, cause love it all ! We should all stay true to our own style, it makes this journey much more interesting.
And I love a great wood antique piece as much as you ! In fact, sometimes I truly hesitate to paint because wood is really beautiful, and so much of the trend now is to paint everything. I think we may regret that in a decade and plenty of pieces will get stripped ! But I’ve got plenty of wood in my home and I love it like you. Thanks for keeping it real Rhoda. Easter blessings to your family!
Kate
Rhoda, This is one of my favorite posts ever. I think many magazine looks can be intimidating to some degree. And some think they have “to do it this way.” Nah — do it your way. Use the magazine photos for courage to try a new paint color or as a brainstorm session with your own instincts and likes. As a regional editor for home decorating magazines, I have helped publish everything from showhouses to budget homes. My personal favorites are those that are approachable and convey personal style. I’m not swayed by brand names. I especially like furnishings and things that have a story to share. I keep it real in my own house, considering everything from comfort to budget, future resale and what I need to do to keep it fresh and current. I look for ideas that suggest a long lifespan. Have a wonderful Easter. best, -susan
Well said. I agree with the comments here – it is easy to get overtaken by ideas in blogland. And I made a command decision several years ago to NOT look at magazines and online decorating sites – to find my style. Over those years, we really saw a dramatic change in our style – a mix of antiques that have been in the family for years, lovely yard sale treasures, DIY rebuilds…but the wall color was the key here. And that color was GREY – OMG, grey? What were you thinking? We heard it over and over – and now that I am lurking back out in blogland for some inspiration on a tweenage girl bedroom makeover (anybody tackled that one yet with success?) – it seems like grey is the in thing. LOL – guess we weren’t the only ones who like it. But I will say this – my grey in on the blue end of the spectrum – still keeping with my first love – blue.
My first and only color love…
Thank you for this great post!!!! As we are getting ready to move I am trying to tweak my style a bit and I appreciate the reminder to make sure it is MY style!!!
THANK YOU for saying EXACTLY what I needed to hear! I’ve always been fairly secure in my own design sensibilities, but the more time I spend trolling design blogs the more I’ve felt a bit schizophrenic. I enjoy finding inspiration from others’ lovely homes, and pretty rooms are fun to look at whether I would want to live in them or not – but it can be overload. Thanks again for this post, and thanks to Hooked On Houses for pointing the way over here!
xox,
Susan
I am so glad I read this post because I have been w ondering and thinking lately about what my style is. My husband would go crazy if we had to have an all white house with minimal colour. He’s all for colour and I have to say thatI love it too because it adds a lot of character. As for my style … I am still not sure. We pick up a lot of stuff on our travels made by local artisans and I love each piece to pieces. There are always so many memories attached to each piece. And now I am starting to love vintage stuff too. So I have to find a way of incorporating both. Hope you had a great Easter.
@Tiffany: There was a great girl’s bedroom makeover recently i believe on centsational which i think you can find via google….very pretty room.
Yes, I have had design envy. I live in the East Coast inner-city and I’m most envious of people who have home offices that look out on verdant greenery! I’m also in awe of those who have fabulously decorated rooms in every home with fresh flowers and accessories everywhere. I’m trying to figure out how in the hell they do it because I have two cats who leave hair on, scratch and climb on/knock over everything! How do people have glass tchotches and breakables everywhere!
I appreciated this post though because I do appreciate having my own home after years of living in apartments. I’m happiest with my recently painted kitchen and dining room where I’ve had several parties, dinners, and holiday celebrations. That I can do that for my family and freinds makes me very happy and that’s what I appreciate most. People always say they love the warmth of my home and while it’s not perfect it’s a work in progress. Thanks for the reminder that perfection is not necessary to enjoy where you live.