What’s your style? Do you know exactly what your style is or is it ever-changing and evolving?
(Coastal Living)
I think for me, I have known my style is Traditional for a long time now. I’ve been drawn to that look over the years and still love it, although in the last few years, I’ve felt the need to de-formalize that Traditional style and make it a little less stuffy. My living room is going through a little tweaking now. It’s the most formal room in my house and even though I still love my furniture, I want to take it down a notch.
With the surge of decorating on the internet that has been going on for a long while now, it’s easy to get sucked into house envy. We see what everyone else has in their homes and I’m not so sure this habit we have of peeking in the windows of all our online friends is a completely healthy one. Fun, yes absolutely, but healthy, maybe not! 🙂
(Traditional Home)
I dived into the online decorating world back in the late 90’s, when decorating boards like Better Homes & Gardens were going strong and were the place to hang out. There I met other obsessed home owners who wanted to talk about houses all the time and it was a lot of fun. I went on to join a private decorating group online in 2000 and from there, blogging took over and here I am.
I still remember the thrill of seeing other people’s house pics and sharing my own and the back and forth conversation that ensued with all of us back in those days. We lived for a new inspiring project from someone else. Now, it’s a little old hat. You can click on any blog and see house after house, style after style of as many differently decorated homes as you can imagine.
So, where am I going with this?
(My living room)
It seems that now that there is SO much out there to absorb and mull over with all the styles and visual overload, we can start to get dissatisfied with what we have. It becomes “oh my gosh, I love that, I want MY house to look like that!”.
We’ve seen the trends of the first decade of this century: Tuscan, French Country, Coastal cottage, Swedish inspired, and a host of others in between, especially the Pottery Barn phenom. I too, am not immune to falling in love with ALL of these looks at one time or another and I enjoy seeing them all. Does that mean I’m going to change out everything in my house and become a devotee of one of those styles?
Absolutely NO WAY!
I’ve carefully acquired and collected every single stick of furniture that’s in my house currently, one piece at a time and I still love every single stick of it. Whatever redecorating goes on at my house will consist of rugs, pillows, fabrics, accessories, and artwork changing out for the most part. You won’t see a whole lot of new furniture coming in my house. If something comes in, something has to go out.
So, as pretty as I think the current trend towards all white might be, it’s not going to happen at my house. I won’t be painting all of my pretty brown antiques white. Cause you see, brown is classic and never goes out of style. It might not be the cutting edge of design at the moment, but I love every single piece of those carefully chosen treasures.
We all have to do do what is right for each one of us when it comes to decorating our homes. I don’t live in a Tuscan home with architectural features to be envied, nor do I live in a stately old historical home with loads of character and patina. I live in a 10 year+ old subdivision and instead of wishing away everything that’s here, I have chosen to embrace my home and make it the best it can be.
I encourage all of you to do the same. It’s so easy to get caught up in blogland with what everyone else is doing, but you live in your home and I live in mine. So, that’s why on this blog, you will see me encouraging all of you to be yourselves, do what makes YOU happy in your home.
That’s how to truly make a house a HOME. A haven for our families. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to have a pretty house, in fact, I think women have that desire innately built in, but we all have budgets and limitations to what we can do. I can see a gorgeous home online and drool all over it, but at the end of the day, I live in my house and choose to make it what works best for my family and lifestyle. Be unique, don’t be afraid to do what makes you happy, even though it may fly in the face of current trends. Trends come and go, we all know that.
So, here’s what you won’t see in my house that is currently all the rage:
- All white slipcovered sofas and chairs, along with all white walls and minimal color (I do have one white slipcovered chair and ottoman that Grandma helped me with. The slipcover cost me $5 in yardsale fabric, labor was free). 🙂 As pretty as this look is, it just won’t work in my house.
- Brick walls or floors, heavy wood beams, a home built with age. My house has limitations on what it can be. So, I live with what I have and make it the best it can possibly be.
(Babs Watkins, House Beautiful)
- All French inspired furniture and accessories. I love this look too, but I’m not going to get rid of everything I have to achieve it right down to the last detail. Practical rules for me.
(Christopher Petkanas, House Beautiful)
- Swedish design, all pale gray/green and minimal furnishings. Again, beautiful and I love to see it in magazines but it’s not me. I have to use what I already have and make it work.
- Sleek styling ala Pottery Barn, with minimal accessories. Again, I enjoy that look too, but much prefer my old antiques and I like my stuff too much to pare down that minimally.
So, how about you?
What do you truly love?
This pic below from House Beautiful probably speaks to me the loudest at this moment. But, will I totally have this look.
No, but I can get inspired from this pic.
Do you fluctuate between styles trying to find the REAL you?
I’ve definitely honed in on my style much more as I’ve gotten older. I’ve become a bit of a snob when it comes to buying vintage things, I so prefer old to new and it’s a whole lot more fun to shop like that.
Does trolling blogs make it easier or harder for you to find your style?
If we’re not careful, we can definitely have house envy, myself included. I see SO many beautiful homes out there, but at the end of the day, I love my home so much and have the best time tweaking it and changing things around. I am truly grateful for our home. We have so many great ideas at our fingertips now, visual overload at times and it can make for some frustration and joy all at the same time.
So, here’s the bottom line on all of this. I urge you to be yourself, find joy in YOUR home and don’t get sucked into doing the latest and greatest in blogland. While there is certainly nothing wrong with getting inspiration and ideas from others in blogland, just be careful that you are going in a direction because YOU truly love it and not because it’s the thing to do this year. Copying might not be the best way to get the home of your dreams. Look, listen, and learn for yourself so that you can take the information you glean and use it in a positive way at your Home Sweet Home.
The End! 🙂
Stephenie says
As a newer blogger (just over a month), I NEEDED to read this today. Thank you so much for keeping me grounded. This was an awesome post.
twice as nice says
You read my mind today Rhoda. Maybe it’s the spring weather but I told Twin the other day I sometimes wish I could get rid of 75% of my things and start over! I think it’s because of all the clean white I see online and in the mags. I’m just going to do some painting and tweaking instead and I’m sure I’ll be happy.
SK says
Amen, Rhonda! I love to browse all the design/decorating blogs but have to remind myself that, although I see many beautiful styles, homes, and rooms out there, not all of them fit my family’s lifestyle. I’ll never forget the look on the saleswoman’s face when I told her I needed a couch the color of dirt because I had three kids and two dogs (I dream of having at least one piece of slipcovered furniture someday!). Your home is gorgeous, and I love the way you take a little of one style and a little of another and make them your own.
Anita says
Well said Rhoda! When i first started reading all of these blogs last fall I found myself having some major house envy. But luckily I didn’t rush out and change things to fit all the beautiful things I saw. It past and I know that really I can have a combination of the things I love and the things I see. I love the last picture you posted because for me it’s a combination. I love the old warn patina of wood that has been loved over the years. But I also love painted pieces. So, it doesn’t have to be all or nothing. I choose what I LOVE. If it doesn’t make me happy, it doesn’t stay. I have gotten much pickier as I get older. But that is how it becomes your own style.
Kathy says
Wow! Thanks so much for the encouragement. I am on a very strict budget. Everything must be almost free because I desparately want to pay off this morgage to be debt free. Yet I so want a beautiful home. Thank you for the reminder to be the best I can be in my home in my circumstances.
diana says
Great post! I still love to browse the blogs, but I have never had house envy.. still have many of the same hand-me-downs from
my first apartment decades ago… and would not have it any other way. I am with you… a few tweaks, some paint and I am good to go. I do have slipcovers, but have had those for years… love them.. thanks for the post.
Angie says
Hi Rhoda,
Enjoyed and appreciated this post, and it’s such an important point you make about crossing the line between “peeking in windows” and comparing homes to the point of dissatifaction with what we currently have in our own homes. We may find ourselves in the uncomfortable position of envy. It’s that envy that can make us unappreciative of what we have and muddies the waters of one’s own true style. I try to keep my focus on what I love, as you said, and what “feels right” to me. I consider beautiful homes, such as yours, a great source of inspiration. Coincidentally, I always go back to Traditional (though I have eclectic elements of cottage and farmhouse) and am also a Thrifter (for 2 decades!) so I have unique pieces that create a one of a kind home. More than a look or a style, I strive to create a feeling of warmth and invitation. This is what you have done so well! I assume your home to be a reflection of the type of person you are: energetic, interesting, layered, traditional, colorful, reliable, but not predictable, warm and inviting, but also with a modern edge of style (without being too deeply seduced in to current trends). I recently had a visitor who just spontaneously said, upon walking into my front living room, “Oh, can I cozy up on your couch for the day?” That’s how I want folks to feel, and I imagine that’s how people feel when they visit your home. ***My take-home- biscuit (tip of the day) when buying anything for my home, especially large purchases, is to answer, with a Yes, this question: “Is it timeless and does it speak to me?”*** In summary, I like to keep my mind focused on keeping a home that nutures my family & friends, but may or may not impress others. Kudos and compliments are nice, but not the goal. I just reiterated everything you said, in my own words. Hah! Again, thanks for this post. And the inspiration. I love that you have your decorating feet on the ground! Kind regards & many blessings to you, Rhoda. ~Angie, a daily reader. 🙂
Erin says
Well said! I lean more toward traditional, although I did redo my keeping room recently with white slipcovers (accessories still fall under traditional category). We are moving this summer and I get to start from a fairly blank slate because we need new furniture anyway. Where will I end up? Probably back to traditional. IMO, it is timeless. But most importantly, it feels like home to me!
Connie Bishop says
What wonderful good advice. You are a wise lady.
Shannon says
This is probably one of the best post that I have read in a very long time. Thanks for encouraging us to not get caught up in the house envy, and do what works for us. I agree that it is so easy to get caught up in that. I wanted to slipcover all my furniture to get that look in the picture, but at the end of the day, all white furniture in a house with two young children, a dog and two cats would never work.
I have always felt that my style was a country classic look, or country modern.. I dont know what you would call it I guess. Either way, it is what it is, and my house would never work with beams or concrete floors either. 🙂
kathysue says
Bravo Miss Rhoda!! I so agree and that is exactly my philosophy. I have never been a trendy girl in fact I usually run the other way. I like a variety of styles and I too change with pillows, art,lamps etc. By time the general public picks up on a design trend the design world has already moved on so we are already OUT before we ever get IN,hehe. I have a couple of exercises on my blog that I have had clients do to find what they really like. One is to write down likes and dislikes and the other is to get out 5 articles that you LOVE and have had for more than 3-5 yrs and make a vignette. It is pretty telling when you are honest with yourself what you really love. Great post and thought provoking, You are one of the blog Queens, xo Kathysue
Ronda says
I felt compelled to comment on your post today. I am new to blogland. I just started my own family one last May. I am considered a “lurker”, I guess, since I only comment on blogs of family and friends and never on the blogs that I enjoy for my own “guillty pleasure”. However, your post today struck a chord with me. We moved into our new home 3 1/2 years ago, and I will admit I am just now allowing myself to find “my style”. Our previous home was so small, I knew we weren’t staying there and we didn’t have the means to really do much with it, so I waited, on everything. I felt a little overwhelmed with so much house to finally do something with and pretty much a blank canvas to start with. I had a few gut instincts for the house from the beginning but kind of ignored them for fear that I would mess it up. At first I rushed to make it a home, then I called in some help, it provided me with direction at the time. However, the whole time I was working the plan she gave me I felt I was moving further away from what I really wanted. I am happy to report that the last year or so I have been saying to myself “forget everyone else, I have always wanted this room yellow, so yellow it shall be. Or I have always wanted a rusty red on this wall so it shall be.” I am LOVING it! During this time I have also found a plethora of home design blogs. While they have been helpful in a lot of ways, I admit to feeling the pull to go one way or another when I see the beautilful homes. I also felt like I was off kilter with the rest of the world because I keep adding color throughout the house while it seems the rest of the world is going with blue, gray, and white everywhere. While I enjoy it in blogland I know that if I tried that in my home I would be bored to tears before even being done implementing the plan. Is it possible to even have a style? I love the Ballard design, Pottery Barn looks, but I also have a dash of an oriental flavoring appearing here and there in my home, not to mention Tuscan and I am sure a hundred different influences. I am hoping it will be beautiful together and not look mod podged together. Anyhow, I am rambling. I just wanted to let you know that I have enjoyed reading your blog the last month or two or three, and that you were right on this morning. Make your home yours and love every minute of it. That is what I am still trying to do.
Thanks,
Ronda
Rosie says
Very nicely said, Rhoda. We all just need to decorate in the way that makes our home happy. I tweek mine all the time, although I lean very heavily on the traditional side, and probably always will. It’s also fun to add a totally unexpected piece in every now and then. It makes your guests say, “What were you thinking!!??”
Katie Ricker says
Thank you for this post. I love a lot of differnt looks also but I buy what I like when it comes down to it. I just did a post on the new white look. Although it is nice we are all going to get sick of it soon!! It is very beachy which I love but not with 3 kids and a dog. I just pick a few new things each season or two and add it with what I like. Buy what you like and you can’t go wrong. I had the same picture in my blog post the one that is so trendy. Love you girl!!
Sarah says
Wonderful post! As someone with organgy wood stained mouldings and interior doors (instead of that gorgeous white I see on most blog homes), I couldn’t agree more.
I find that viewing house blogs makes me more aware of my decorating style (which I cannot define). I prefer blogs featuring decorating styles similar to my own. While I appreciate the lots fo white, cottage/beachy, shabby chic styles, that are just not for me and my family. So,while I’ll occasionally check a blog with this type of decorating style out, it’s not often.
Joyce Ostermiller says
Thank you for this post. I have found myself trying to copy different rooms on some blogs. Just a couple of days ago I realized this and even mentioned to my husband that by the time I got done doing what “so and so” had done in their homes, they had already changed theirs. Light Bulb moment!! Try to be myself! I have learned lots of DIY things, which I enjoy, though.
Sherron says
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I needed to hear that. I love getting ideas for using what I have but I don’t want to envy people’s things. Happy Easter!!
Stacey says
Absolutely! I couldn’t agree with you more. My style is actually very similar to yours…to me it’s Southern Living style. I’ve liked this look for many years. We buy quality furniture and we keep it. (The doggone four poster bed that I’m over will probably go to my grave with me.)
I too have found that I get a pretty good case of house envy sometimes. Then I walk back through and feel happy and surrounded by beautiful things I love. What more could you want?
Beth@UnskinnyBoppy says
Great post, Rhoda!! I SO needed to hear this right now. I’ve been sitting in a holding pattern with my house on the market for nearly two years now. I’m so disgusted with it all, but I know that once I am able to pull all my gorgeous stuff back out of storage that I will love it again, and it will all be new and fun and exciting redecorating with it all. I am very much a french country traditionalist. There are times that I’m envious of the cottage chic look, but I know it’s not practical for me at all with a 2 year old. Maybe I’ll pick one room and make it a cottage haven. 🙂 Laundry rooms seem to be a good place for that. hehe
Amanda @ Serenity Now says
THANK YOU, Rhoda. 🙂 I loved this post…I’m gonna feature it on Friday, as a matter of fact. 🙂 My first experience online was on the Southern Living message boards back in 2001 or so. That eventually led me to blogging, but you are right…it is SO easy to be envious of others’ creativity instead of being inspired to do it your way and be you. 🙂 Thanks for the encouragement. 🙂