Today is one of those posts that I take a deep breath, click the Publish button and hope for the best.
In the going on 5 years that I’ve been blogging, I’ve shared bits and pieces of my personal life along the way. If you had told me then that I would be a full time blogger in 2011, single again, without a home of my own, and living with my elderly parents, I would not have believed it. That would not even have seemed a possibility to me at the time. You just can’t plan for things like that to happen in life. Sometimes life takes a sharp left turn and you are not prepared for it.
{Two of my treasures, one of which is never too old to sit in her granddaddy’s lap}
This is not going to be a downer post, but rather one that I hope uplifts, gives glory where glory is due and gives all of you out there the shot in the arm that you might need to believe that things can be good. From bad. Faith is the key word here.
As blogging has gotten so popular in the last few years, we are all invited into each others home. Even encouraged to peek in the windows. How many times have you clicked on a blog and looked at the pretty pictures of the home, the homeowner, the homeowner’s beautiful children and cute husband and figured she has it all together? I doubt that is true in real life. None of us totally have it all together.
But the blog world sure can paint a pretty picture. We are what we portray on our blogs to the world. No one truly knows all that goes on behind the scenes of anyone’s life, but our friends and family. Those folks get to see the real us all the time. So, it’s easy to be a little wistful when we see a gorgeous home, beautiful family and think that person is so, so fortunate to be living such a good life. A dreamy life. Those glossy magazine picture perfect pics can be deceiving and no one lives the perfect life.
{Mother’s Day, 2011:Â my sister, Renee, Mom, Lauren and me}
My life certainly hasn’t been perfect by any means. I have been transparent at times, but I’ll spare you all the gory details of my bad choices, disappointing failures, and marital non-bliss that have been such a part of my life. You know from what I’ve shared this year, that it’s been a heartbreaking one for me on many levels. Life just doesn’t always turn out the way we plan or dream or hope for. That, my friends, is reality.
But, I’m here to tell you that there is a silver lining to the black clouds. There is hope in the midst of a storm. There is a new day and a brighter tomorrow. We all go through trials and pain and sorrow in life. There is no escaping that. The Bible gives us plenty of clues that life just ain’t always a bed of roses. God allows us to walk in the rain and brings storms into our lives, sometimes for months and we can’t always see where that is leading.
What good could possibly come out of all of the bad?
I do not have all the answers, but I’m here to give some of you hope. I’m a middle-aged woman in the midst of a life crisis. It’s not over yet. I’m in the middle of getting a divorce. My soon-to-be (I hope) ex-husband is in jail for good reasons, related to, but none of which have anything to do with the financial devastation he has done to me (for those of you waiting for some scoop, there you go!). Maybe one day I will write that book, you never know. It is certainly an interesting story, one that I am still in disbelief over the fact that it has been a part of my life.
So, life goes on. I am alone again. I have no idea if I’ll ever find (true) love again. Do I hope that there is love for me in the future? Yes, yes I do. If God allows it, my heart would be open to it. In the meantime, I will keep doing what He has allowed me to do and continue on the path He has led me on. I will be patient and wait.
I started my own business about 3 years ago, which grew out of this blog. I love being creative and always dreamed of doing something other than working in the Corporate world and when I started blogging almost 5 years ago, I had no idea that it would turn into my dream job. Working from home. Sharing decorating and design inspiration. Talking about my travels. Sharing my family with all of you. Cooking recipes. Getting to go on fun trips. Doing life. I’m so, so grateful that God allowed it to blossom and bloom into what it is now. I’m so fortunate that He has blessed me so much just since I moved back home with my parents in April. So many new doors have opened and opportunities have come my way. It makes me all teary-eyed to think about it.
Is there anything I’ve done to make this happen? No, not at all. God has done it for me. I’m not getting rich from blogging, by any means. But, he has allowed this to become my source of income. Something that I love to do. Some days, I will tell you that I get sad and a little down, remembering what I used to have. I had a nice house, 2 of them in fact. Now I have neither. I miss having a house that is mine to do with what I want to do. I miss being creative and having fun with that. Being a blogger can just magnify that part too.
But, you know what? That is OK.  I have to believe that I will have a house again. So many folks in this country are going through hard times. Many have lost jobs and lost homes. These are tough times. I am not alone. I’m learning to appreciate the small things in life and be content in my circumstances. Peace and contentment cannot be purchased. They are priceless. I may never have the financial security I thought I once had again. That is up to the Lord too.
I have to remind myself daily that I’ve got SO much to be thankful for and believe me, I AM thankful. God has allowed me to still have my parents at my age. They could easily have been gone already, but they are here for me. They love me unconditionally and give me the emotional support I need all the time, as do my whole family and my wonderful friends. I am grateful for all of them!
So, if you are going through a hard time, let me just remind you, that God is still there. He cares. Ask Him to help you and He will. He might not do it the way you expect, but He will always, always take care of his children. I’m a testimony to that. I have no idea what my future holds. This whole blogging thing just might blow up and we all may be on the street and if it does, that is OK too. I know that He will take care of me.
Let me just take this opportunity to once again thank all of YOU out there who faithfully come to visit me. Each and every day. Many of you just lurk and never leave comments and that is OK too. I know you are out there and I’m grateful that you take a little bit of your precious time each day to spend with me. I don’t take that for granted.
If you have always dreamed of doing something from home (or not from home) and never had the chance, I want to encourage you to give it a try. You never know if you don’t try. I started my business with the hopes of having a full fledged decorating business and it has turned out not so much about that as being able to write and share about decorating through this blog. I would love to develop that side of my business more and maybe it will come with time. In the meantime, I continue to do what I’m doing and as long as it is blessed, I will stay on this road. I consider this blog my ministry of sorts too.
Don’t give up! If you have dreams that have never been fulfilled, don’t give up. It’s not too late. If I can reinvent myself in my mid-50’s, you can certainly do it too. Follow your heart. Follow your dreams and do what you are passionate about and I truly believe you will find a way to be successful at it.
So, that’s it! That’s my pep talk for today. I hope my being vulnerable will help someone else realize that you, too have much to offer and a God-given talent that you can use as well, to fulfill those long ago dreams that you might have been putting off. Waiting for another day.
As the old Nike tag line says, Just Do It!
What are you dreaming of? Please tell me, I want to know.Is there something you’ve wanted to try and haven’t because of fear or uncertainty?
{I’ve been camping out in the old Streams in the Desert devotional this year and there are some great nuggets in there. Psalms 138:8 The Lord will perfect that which concerns me; your mercy oh Lord, endures forever; Do not forsake the works of your hands}.
Rhoda, thank you for that post. I also love the old Streams in the Desert. A friend gave that to me when our family was going through something and I have since passed it on to someone else. Life is not like a magazine cover and I appreciate your willingness to be real. That’s what we all need, to see others be real. Whatever is good in any of us is because God allowed it. I pray the Lord will bless your efforts in your business. It has also been a dream of mine to own a decrating business but I’m still in the business of raising children. I truly enjoy your blog. Thanks for what you do.
Thank you thank you thank you for such a wonderful post. I truly appreciate it when bloggers can be transparent and honest about their lives. None of us have perfect lives and the fact that you can take what has happened to you in the past and turn in into an uplifting and encouraging post is truly a gift to each of us who reads it. Thank you for the reminder to be grateful for the good things that God has given me. Sometimes it’s hard not to be bitter because of life’s circumstances, but how wonderful to know that there is a God who is bigger that ourselves and who helps us to be better. Have a blessed day!!!
Thank you for sharing what was on your heart. I enjoy visiting your blog each day. God bless you.
Rhoda,
I too am a lurker. I think I started reading your blog about 4 years ago, and I read it every day. Thank you so much for opening your heart to us. Like so many others who read decorating type blogs and see the perfect home and family, I’d wonder what was wrong with me, because that is definately not my life. Thanks for reminding me no one has the perfect life! God is using you in a profound way even through the terrible pain you are suffering. Hang in there. God is good, even when it doesn’t feel like it! You might consider reading a book that has meant a lot to me recently. It is by James McDonald, “When Life is Hard”. There is also a DVD set to go with it that is awesome.
Be blessed!
Rhonda,
I guess I could be a “lurker”, I’ve been reading your blog for a while now (probably two years) and it’s one of my favorites!!! I love the honesty that you share with us and your faith is so great! I am so proud to call you my sister through Christ! I pray that God continues to bless you and your family! Thank you for this post today, I think that it’s one that we all needed to read!
Dear Rhoda,
Thank you so much for this post. Everything you wrote is so true. There were days when I was reading some blogs and being so jealous. I thought that there are women that have it all – beautiful houses, beautiful gardens, beautiful families, perfect lives. And the funniest thing is that my life also looks like that to people that dont really know me. ´And is so not true.
This winter and spring I also had many problems and my hole life could change in a minute. I was even prepared to start a new life from beginning. Happily for me everything went well but I am still recovering from all that stress. I visited your blog many times then and your optimism always gave me hope that everything will somehow just end well. that God will just arrange things somehow. Thank you very much for sharing your story. I wish you all the best.
P.S. I am not a native english speaker so plese forgive me my grammar and spelling.
I agree with you and everything you said. Blogs are now being used the wrong ways at times. I love how honest you are you always have been a real person. I am so sorry you are going through so much but take heart God does have a plan. You are a strong woman and in your pain your encouraging others. Thank you for being one of the real bloggers out there!!
Rhoda,
I have missed just knowing that you were right down the road in Birmingham. It sounds like God is blessing you and bestowing grace upon your life. What a blessing you must be to your parents at this stage in their life!
Dreams? My largest dream is to have a bed and breakfast. My husband told me of an opportunity to build a bed and breakfast just off the Natchez Trace close to where we live now. It is next to a memorial stone wall built in honor to an Indian lady who walked back to Florence from the Oklahoma territory after being forced from her home during the Trail of Tears. I would love, love, love to build that bed & breakfast, but the financial risk, my husband being forced into retirement at age 50, and our son away in his freshman year at college makes me feel I need to keep my secure full-time job. I’m still looking for that opportunity maybe when I am in “my” mid-50’s. 10 years…that’s not too long to wait.
Judy 🙂
I read your blog everyday. Most times I don’t comment but today I’m so moved by what you wrote that I need to comment. You are such a beautiful woman, inside and out, and I feel you’ve found the silver lining everyone needs to find when things get difficult. God bless you and your beautiful family.
Thank you. I so needed to hear your message today. I have been going through financial difficulties for a long time and was feeling really low. I needed a reminder that things will be good (wonderful) again. And you are right, things will get better! Where can you go but UP when you reach the bottom??!! The sky is the limit.
God bless you Rhoda.
I applaud your bravery and your faith
Rhoda,
I know you are walking through the fires right now, but I just know God has wonderful plans for you. He’s already showing you that, isn’t he? 🙂 You’ve really inspired and given hope to so many by your post. Looking forward to getting together again, my friend!
Susan
Oh Miss Rhoda! Thank you. I’m sorry life has been tough for you lately. I’m sure more than any of us realize. But thank you for sharing and being transparent. I have a lot of blogs I follow and the ones I like the best are those that show the human side of their lives.
You’re right, it’s so easy to look at blogs and think how perfect their lives must be. But when they share the good and the bad, well, that’s when I feel most connected. It’s kind of like people out in the world who are honest and truly themselves… they give off this glow and are amazing to be around.
So, what do I want? I want to start a blog, although I don’t know that I have anything different to share. I’m afraid… mostly of judgement. Sad, but true.
Anyway, enough rambling. But, thank you, again, for a great post!
Rhoda,
This is one of the BEST posts I’ve ever read and it echoes my thoughts and feelings regarding blogging and what I frequently tell people. We ALL have stories — good, bad, beautiful and ugly — and ALL of those experiences make us who we are. It’s life. The only thing that gets us through it is knowing and trusting in HIS divine plan.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Your Friend,
Deborah
Like many others I am a lurker, never comment. Today you touched my heart, what a lovely woman you are, I needed to read this today, thank you so much.
Rhoda,
Thank you for being so honest. Thank you for being real. I read your blog every day and I am inspired in so many ways but today was worth all the trips over here. I can’t imagine all that you have been through this year, I can only imagine the heart ache but I do know that God is still on His throne and can use anything , if we allow it, for His glory and for your good. I can’t wait to see all that God is going to do with your sweet life. Thank you again for this sweet, heart felt post!
Blessings!
Hi Rhoda-
You are the most open and honest blogger. You are so real and that it what your strength is. God bless you for writing this post. It has uplifted me just when I needed it. I don’t talk about the downer subject in my life on my blog much, but ever since I started my blog – my hubby has been unemployed. 2 1/2 years. He had a great position and his salary let us lead a very nice life, but he is in his mid 50’s and the first to go in this economy. We are an upbeat couple and try to stay positive, knowing that there are many not as fortunate as us, but it is still hard to act like life is normal. I just thank god I have a roof over my head and people that love me.
Thanks again for being so open and honest about your life. I for one am happy you pressed the Publish button. God bless you XO
My best- Diane
What an inspiring post! So true, Peace is priceless! And God is soooo Good!
Love your blog! You have shown such grace over the past few months and never fail to provide inspiration – sometimes style and sometimes spiritual. Keep up the good work!
What a powerful truth!! We all have many things in our lives to be thankful for. Thank you for sharing with us your up’s and down’s. God has big things for you, I’m looking forward to reading all about them. It’s so true that we don’t always understand why God let’s bad things happen to us, but in every thing give glory to his name!!!
Praying you have a BLESSED day:)