Today is one of those posts that I take a deep breath, click the Publish button and hope for the best.
In the going on 5 years that I’ve been blogging, I’ve shared bits and pieces of my personal life along the way. If you had told me then that I would be a full time blogger in 2011, single again, without a home of my own, and living with my elderly parents, I would not have believed it. That would not even have seemed a possibility to me at the time. You just can’t plan for things like that to happen in life. Sometimes life takes a sharp left turn and you are not prepared for it.
{Two of my treasures, one of which is never too old to sit in her granddaddy’s lap}
This is not going to be a downer post, but rather one that I hope uplifts, gives glory where glory is due and gives all of you out there the shot in the arm that you might need to believe that things can be good. From bad. Faith is the key word here.
As blogging has gotten so popular in the last few years, we are all invited into each others home. Even encouraged to peek in the windows. How many times have you clicked on a blog and looked at the pretty pictures of the home, the homeowner, the homeowner’s beautiful children and cute husband and figured she has it all together? I doubt that is true in real life. None of us totally have it all together.
But the blog world sure can paint a pretty picture. We are what we portray on our blogs to the world. No one truly knows all that goes on behind the scenes of anyone’s life, but our friends and family. Those folks get to see the real us all the time. So, it’s easy to be a little wistful when we see a gorgeous home, beautiful family and think that person is so, so fortunate to be living such a good life. A dreamy life. Those glossy magazine picture perfect pics can be deceiving and no one lives the perfect life.
{Mother’s Day, 2011: my sister, Renee, Mom, Lauren and me}
My life certainly hasn’t been perfect by any means. I have been transparent at times, but I’ll spare you all the gory details of my bad choices, disappointing failures, and marital non-bliss that have been such a part of my life. You know from what I’ve shared this year, that it’s been a heartbreaking one for me on many levels. Life just doesn’t always turn out the way we plan or dream or hope for. That, my friends, is reality.
But, I’m here to tell you that there is a silver lining to the black clouds. There is hope in the midst of a storm. There is a new day and a brighter tomorrow. We all go through trials and pain and sorrow in life. There is no escaping that. The Bible gives us plenty of clues that life just ain’t always a bed of roses. God allows us to walk in the rain and brings storms into our lives, sometimes for months and we can’t always see where that is leading.
What good could possibly come out of all of the bad?
I do not have all the answers, but I’m here to give some of you hope. I’m a middle-aged woman in the midst of a life crisis. It’s not over yet. I’m in the middle of getting a divorce. My soon-to-be (I hope) ex-husband is in jail for good reasons, related to, but none of which have anything to do with the financial devastation he has done to me (for those of you waiting for some scoop, there you go!). Maybe one day I will write that book, you never know. It is certainly an interesting story, one that I am still in disbelief over the fact that it has been a part of my life.
So, life goes on. I am alone again. I have no idea if I’ll ever find (true) love again. Do I hope that there is love for me in the future? Yes, yes I do. If God allows it, my heart would be open to it. In the meantime, I will keep doing what He has allowed me to do and continue on the path He has led me on. I will be patient and wait.
I started my own business about 3 years ago, which grew out of this blog. I love being creative and always dreamed of doing something other than working in the Corporate world and when I started blogging almost 5 years ago, I had no idea that it would turn into my dream job. Working from home. Sharing decorating and design inspiration. Talking about my travels. Sharing my family with all of you. Cooking recipes. Getting to go on fun trips. Doing life. I’m so, so grateful that God allowed it to blossom and bloom into what it is now. I’m so fortunate that He has blessed me so much just since I moved back home with my parents in April. So many new doors have opened and opportunities have come my way. It makes me all teary-eyed to think about it.
Is there anything I’ve done to make this happen? No, not at all. God has done it for me. I’m not getting rich from blogging, by any means. But, he has allowed this to become my source of income. Something that I love to do. Some days, I will tell you that I get sad and a little down, remembering what I used to have. I had a nice house, 2 of them in fact. Now I have neither. I miss having a house that is mine to do with what I want to do. I miss being creative and having fun with that. Being a blogger can just magnify that part too.
But, you know what? That is OK. I have to believe that I will have a house again. So many folks in this country are going through hard times. Many have lost jobs and lost homes. These are tough times. I am not alone. I’m learning to appreciate the small things in life and be content in my circumstances. Peace and contentment cannot be purchased. They are priceless. I may never have the financial security I thought I once had again. That is up to the Lord too.
I have to remind myself daily that I’ve got SO much to be thankful for and believe me, I AM thankful. God has allowed me to still have my parents at my age. They could easily have been gone already, but they are here for me. They love me unconditionally and give me the emotional support I need all the time, as do my whole family and my wonderful friends. I am grateful for all of them!
So, if you are going through a hard time, let me just remind you, that God is still there. He cares. Ask Him to help you and He will. He might not do it the way you expect, but He will always, always take care of his children. I’m a testimony to that. I have no idea what my future holds. This whole blogging thing just might blow up and we all may be on the street and if it does, that is OK too. I know that He will take care of me.
Let me just take this opportunity to once again thank all of YOU out there who faithfully come to visit me. Each and every day. Many of you just lurk and never leave comments and that is OK too. I know you are out there and I’m grateful that you take a little bit of your precious time each day to spend with me. I don’t take that for granted.
If you have always dreamed of doing something from home (or not from home) and never had the chance, I want to encourage you to give it a try. You never know if you don’t try. I started my business with the hopes of having a full fledged decorating business and it has turned out not so much about that as being able to write and share about decorating through this blog. I would love to develop that side of my business more and maybe it will come with time. In the meantime, I continue to do what I’m doing and as long as it is blessed, I will stay on this road. I consider this blog my ministry of sorts too.
Don’t give up! If you have dreams that have never been fulfilled, don’t give up. It’s not too late. If I can reinvent myself in my mid-50’s, you can certainly do it too. Follow your heart. Follow your dreams and do what you are passionate about and I truly believe you will find a way to be successful at it.
So, that’s it! That’s my pep talk for today. I hope my being vulnerable will help someone else realize that you, too have much to offer and a God-given talent that you can use as well, to fulfill those long ago dreams that you might have been putting off. Waiting for another day.
As the old Nike tag line says, Just Do It!
What are you dreaming of? Please tell me, I want to know.Is there something you’ve wanted to try and haven’t because of fear or uncertainty?
{I’ve been camping out in the old Streams in the Desert devotional this year and there are some great nuggets in there. Psalms 138:8 The Lord will perfect that which concerns me; your mercy oh Lord, endures forever; Do not forsake the works of your hands}.
Jasmine says
I just simply want to say to you BRAVO! As my uncle would say “you did good kiddo” Thank you for sharing your story. It was brave of you. I know it’s your faith that got you through and will continue to carry you in life. You wear the favor of God well. It looks real good on you. I know it’s been over a year since you wrote this piece, but it contiues to inspire others and my hope for you is that God has continued to bless you and encourage you through this journey we call life.
Melinda Hartzog says
Thank you for having the courage to post this. What a strong individual you are! I am VERY new to the blog world and your pep talk is just what this southern gal needed. I always tell my daughters to follow their bliss and they will be on the right path. Today you reminded me to do the same!
Regina Walker says
Thanks for sharing your story. Like you, I too have gone through many, many heartaches and am not sure the pains are all gone. But God will see me through.
Kathleen Mitchell says
Thank you for your honest insight! You are so right in all you said. I too have just begun to create my dream world… Graduated from college in 2012 at age 48, and just completed my 1st novel which I hope to have published. Many say its too late, I’m too old, etc… But God has laid this on my heart and if there’s one thing I’ve learned through my trials is that if God want you to do it, just do it! He will work out all the details! God bless you! You are a beautiful person- inside and out and I have NO doubt you will prosper and succeed at any endeavor you undertake!
Geneva says
my gosh. I want to thank you for your honesty about all that has transpired in your life. You had handled it with such strength – and courage! I know this is an old post, but I just found it. I happen to think you are a wonderful person with a great outlook, down to earth style and outlook and a fabulous sense of class. I will be watching you – and wishing you the best! Please keep blogging; you are my inspiration.
Gerontologist says
Rhoda,
Your experience and your willingness to share with others is amazing. I love your blog and your decorating. I know God will continue to bless you. If he brings you to it, he will bring you through it.
My mom died Oct. 6, 2012. She was diagnosed with cancer and lived 6 days. Her favorite bible verse was I Thessalonians 5:18-“In everything give thanks for this is the will of God in Christ concerning you.”
Best wishes for a blessed new year.
DeAnn says
Thank you for opening up your life to this world. You will probably never know how you have helped, inspired and given courage to so many through sharing your story. I came across your blog by Cleverly Inspired. A wonderful blog to follow. I also have read the daily devotionals from Streams in the Desert. I agree by Faith we will survive. I have had a life changing event too but mine is physical. My identity has changed but I also know I am blessed by God that has given me a loving family and friends that help me overcome those hard days. The Lord allowed me to cross your path this early morning for a reason. That is my Faith. Blessings and sunshine to you always.
Cathy says
This is a wonderful blog! I was really excited about your DIY posts then I happened upon this post and I was really blessed. Life is has not been easy cancer, medical debts, no children and infertility….people ask why I am happy and I say I am choosing to be happy! God did not promise a perfect life but in him, life is perfect. I’m alive. I’m breathing and I was able to read your post and feel blessed all over again! I am so encouraged by you and for you. I know God is going to bless you beyond what you can even imagine!!
Beth Morrow says
Wow, thanks for mentioning this post. Somehow, I have not read it, but boy, i even have more respect for your attitude and want you to know that your testimony is heart lifting!
Its always so easy to say, “trust the Lord” to someone going through trials, but its another story when you are the one having to “trust the Lord.” You have exemplified “trusting the Lord”.
Thanks for sharing your beautifully transformed home. I always so enjoy your post and am disappointed when i dont find one in my mail.
Keep doing what you do.
O, and one of my dreams is to start my own blog. I keep saying, “this is the year!”. But it is still a dream so,far. I am not as computer sauve as you so I am having to learn how to do the simple things, but hopefully…this is the year!
Beth
Kim Hites says
This post has touched me deeply. I met you at Haven last year and you are so lovely and sweet. Trust in God and faith is where it’s all at! I’m divorced but happily married now and following my dreams at middle-age, too! Hugs
Barbara Smith says
Can you tell me what Haven is? Thank you
Rhoda says
HI, Barbara, it’s a blog conference we started last year here in Atlanta. Check it out at havenconference.com.
mary says
great story, thanks for the inspiration.
Lea says
You are so inspirational. I just know God knew I needed your words today, thanks for your courage and willingness to share your story, though painful at times. I really appreciate it, and am praying God continues to look on you with favor in 2013!!!
Sonja says
I happened on your blog this morning by way of Pinterest. I was reading about painting interior doors. As I strolled through your blog, I came to this post. How refreshing and encouraging! Thank you and God bless!
snowmanluv says
Thanks for sharing. Many of us out in blog world appreciate all that you do. We look at your ideas and try to put them into our own homes. Thanks for taking the courage to continue and explore. Thanks for helping all of us make our houses “pretty” despite not having budgets just creativity, willpower, and a sense to learn and read how others did it. Lots of us love decorating but out budgets are so tight that we don’t want to make mistakes which is why we refer to the experts like your blog/website. Thank you for sharing.
Cindy Hancock says
I’m reading your story again because I needed some inspiration today! Your faith and tenacity are so strong and I know you are encouraging others with your transparency. Please don’t stop! God still has many great plans for you! One of my favorite verses I cling to is “For I know the plans that I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11
Take care and blessings,
Cindy
anne says
My family lost our home last year and are now renting. i found blogs this month and have been so sad that i see all these wonderful homes and i do not have a home of my own…I hope my own home comes my way and i can use your tips to make a home..thanks
Rhoda says
Anne, hang in there. I didn’t have a home of my own for almost 2 years too and it was worth waiting for. It will come!
sonia says
Just read your post. Putting it simply, it touched my heart. I had my own “wake-up” call a little over a year ago and find my self divorced with 2 children (something I never expected). After the shock and devestation and walking around in a fog for months, I’m slowly finding myself again. I have told my children that God will pull us through and if we keep our faith something even greater is waiting for us in our future. I thank you for being so honest and positive in such a difficult, emotional time. I hope we both find love again but I have to share with you something someone recently told me… “All men are dogs. Some of them just have a little more puppy in them!” I thought maybe you could appreciate that comment.
I’ll be sending prayers your way.
Francine Melder says
Rhoda:
I am humbled by your transparency and willingness to share. You truly are an inspiration and hope to all who read your life and meet you. I knew when I sat at lunch with you at the MMS workshop a few weeks ago that you were a deep soul. I was so busy focusing on getting information from others about how to start a booth and blog that I did not take the time to appreciate you.
I look forward to tuning in regularly and learning from someone who has been there, done that, and is still standing, grounded firmly in her faith. May you be blessed far beyond your wildest dreams. You surely deserve it.
Naomi S says
Just found your blog via Songbird- I am loving it. Thank you for sharing your creativity, family, life, struggles, etc. As a fellow 50+ year old, I am truly inspired by your accomplishments. You have encouraged me and reminded me that in the Lord we always have hope. Continued blessings! Lamentations 3: 22-23