I’ve got some family news to share today and wanted to keep you all in the loop too. I’ve talked about my parents mountain house many many times over the years I’ve been blogging. I’ve shared posts and activities that we have had in that mountain house as a family. Mom and Dad built the house over 30 years ago outside Murphy, NC and it’s been a summer getaway spot for them. They spent so much time up there during summer months and dad planted a huge garden up there every summer as well as his house here in Marietta. Two gardens! If you follow me on Instagram, you saw us up there a couple of Fridays ago for the last time.
It’s a house on 6 acres, with a stream in the front yard and a nice flat area below for his garden. Perfect for them. The last time he planted up there was 2016. In 2017 he was very ill as you all probably remember and his garden that year was very minimal. He planted last year at their Marietta house, but it’s been 3 years since the mountain garden was planted. He dearly loved that plot of ground and it grew some incredible vegetables over the years.
I’ve done several posts on the house and garden, but this one is a good recap on all of it. You can see the home cooked vegetable meals my mom made on this post and there are others linked off it as well.
And here’s another good post on the mountain house, with some of our relatives visiting and a fish fry we had. Such good food and fond memories of this house over the years. If you read those posts, you can really get a feel for what this mountain house has meant to my parents and our entire extended family. It was always their dream to have a house up there in the NC mountains. Our family had vacationed up there for years. My youthful memories are great of the Smoky mountains and much of our extended family spent so much time there as well. Many of our family members have gathered at this house over the years too and we have eaten some good Southern cooking.
So two or 3 years ago, we all began talking about when the time would come that mom and dad would sell the house. As I mentioned, 2016 was the last year dad gardened up there. He had two gardens and at almost 90 at the time, it was too much for him to do both. Mom was ready for him to give it up too (it was a lot of work for her too, with canning and putting up vegetables) and the next year (2017) took care of that, as that’s when he got c-diff and couldn’t do any gardening that year. Thank goodness, he has recovered enough that he grew some things last year and he’s going to plant a few things this year as well, but his strength is waning now and he just can’t do what he’s always done.
That’s his happy place, his garden. I know it’s sad for them to sell this place, but we all agree that it’s time. The time has come that he can no longer keep the house up, keep the grass and brush cut back as it should be and just overall take care of the house. You all know how much upkeep a house and grounds take, especially when you don’t live there full time.
Closing is tomorrow and we will all breathe a sigh of relief to sell the house. The good Lord smiled on them too and the new owners wanted everything in the house as well, including the contents of the basement. That was a relief to mom and really was a relief to us as well. We had talked about having to clean out that house many times and none of us were looking forward to that. So, this was an added bonus and blessing!
The house unfortunately is not worth a lot of money, but the memories left behind are priceless. It’s time to leave it behind. Keeping the house wasn’t an option for me or my sister or Lauren. We all have our own houses and live too far away to take care of another house. Plus, it wasn’t our dream place, but theirs. It took about a year and 1/2 for the house to sell and we are glad it’s finally happening. The new couple that’s buying it will love it, I’m sure.
My sister, brother-in-law, and I went up with mom and dad a couple of weeks ago to pick up their personal belongings. That swing and rocking chair came home with them. Lauren is getting the swing. It was a gift from my dad’s church congregation and it’s a good one. The rocking chair is a Brumby rocker, famous in these parts. Lauren is going to hang the swing in her backyard cabana in Louisiana.
We walked around and helped mom pack up clothes and personal items to bring home. Thank goodness we didn’t have to go through everything. She was so happy about that! They don’t need a thing from this house, as their Marietta house is full too. They have all they need here.
The welcome signs will be left behind.
Dad was feeling a little sad, I know, but he handled it well. He can’t do a lot these days as far as moving boxes and all, so we did it for him. He’s not nearly as strong as he was before he got sick.
Packing up clothes to bring home. We were just talking yesterday about how nice it will be to not have to worry about the house anymore. Mom will be glad especially as she handles most of the bills and anything to do with running the house. No more filling up the natural gas tank, worrying about upkeep on the house, or paying property taxes every year. That adds up too.
I snapped a few pics around the house as we went through, things that have been in the house for so long.
I found a Jadeite bowl and brought it home. One of mom’s longtime collection.
I snapped one more pic of mom and dad to document the last day as we locked the doors and came back home. Closing is tomorrow and that will mark the end of this chapter for the mountain house.
We met up with my cousin who lives up there for lunch and I caught dad in a laughing moment. They have spent so much time up here over the years, but I know it will be a relief as well as sad to bring this to a close.
I thought you all would like to know this news too since I’ve shared that house so much over my blogging life. Life changes and evolves and this is one of those changes for our family. It’s sad, but necessary and we all know that. It’s just another reminder that life is short and we better enjoy it while we have it. Don’t take those days and moments for granted. Every day is precious and one day we will look back and remember the good ole’ days for what they were.
Every family goes thru this process. Aging parents, selling property and figuring out what’s next. We hope our parents can just stay in their current home for the rest of their lives. That would be our wish, but of course we don’t know what the future holds. They are still doing pretty well on their own and we are close by if they need us.
Have you all gone through this too in your family? I am sure many of you have. It’s a part of life and things that we all have to deal with. Life is precious and full of good memories. Hold on to all of them! When I posted on Instagram and Facebook while were were up there that day going through this day,
I did have a couple of comments on Facebook that were rather unnecessary. Something to the effect that it’s just too bad that children take over and make their parents sell homes and do things they don’t want to do. And why isn’t this house staying in the family? Comments to that effect. I did respond back to them that we all have homes of our own, we live too far away to keep the house and besides, it’s not our dream place to have, so it was time to sell. When folks can’t take care of a house any longer, nor can family members take care of it, it’s time to go. We will have no regrets about selling the house and leaving it behind. The memories will always be in our hearts though! Can’t take that away!
Judy says
I’m sure it was bittersweet for all of you leaving for the last time. As you said, the wonderful memories will always be with you. It must be a big relief for them not having to take care of a second home and all that that entails. Your parents look so happy. I’m glad to see how healthy your dad looks. Ignore the bullies on Facebook, there will always be a few.
Leslie says
Well, said, Rhoda. Yes, many of us have had to deal with aging parents and it’s never easy to make hard decisions during challenging times. For anyone to suggest you or your family “forced” your parents to do something they didn’t want, or felt they needed, to do at this time in their lives is both inaccurate and inappropriate. You have made it clear several times that this was not the case with your family and your family all agreed that, given the circumstances, it was time for your parents to sell their summer home. It’s never an enjoyable situation to let go of a beloved, special home, but we all have to make difficult choices in life. I’m glad you and your family all were able to help your parents deal with the situation and help them as they closed that chapter. Nothing is forever and no one else can, or should, substitute their judgement for yours with respect to your choices. I’m glad your parents will always have the memories of their beloved mountain home. I’ve certainly enjoyed reading about it over the years and I hope they will continue to enjoy their lives in comfort in their Marietta home and garden, and without the stress of maintaining a second home.
Kathy says
I’m happy for your parents. What beautiful memories they provided for all of you there.
Nancy Range Anderson says
Best of luck to your mom and dad! While it is a sad process, in the end it will feel as if a burden was lifted! My husband and I downsized two years ago and moved to a place that we bought in a town that we love by the beach. It was hard to part with some of the things from the old home. In the end though, they were just “things” and I have memories and pictures of them to move me forward. They same for you you, your sister and of course your parents. All the best to them!
Kathleen says
Thank you for sharing your beautiful family and stories with us! Life is all about endings and new beginnings.
Linda says
So sorry that comments were made to you and your family on Facebook. No one knows what it’s like till they have to go through it. We are all different and we go through times of happiness and sadness in our natural things but to me is the love of your family and that your Mom and Dad are still together and healthy enough to live out their lives together. Our Lord has been good to them. That means more than any material things on this old earth. Like you said life is short….enjoy every minute. Time goes by so fast. I never had a close family so I’ve enjoyed reading about yours. I had my husband for 44 years. Life goes on but still very sad. So glad your parents have each other and such a loving wonderful family.
Barbara Moore says
Anyone that has followed your blog fo any amount of time has witnessed the love your family shares. C-Diff through your family a curve and has resulted in some changes. I know for sure it would be a lot harder for your dad to be at his mountain home and not be able to take care of it. This is a sad, but necessary next step in life. People can be so cruel. I’m sure the hateful comments were painful, even though you’re an experienced blogger and know there will always be ‘those comments’. Just know the folks that care so much for you and your parents understands completely. God Bless, Rhoda.
Nancy says
I know this is a difficult time. I went through these things with my parents. They went to be with the Lord at ages 94 and 96. Unfortunately we had to move them into a nursing home for their last years because my mom’s Dementia was so bad. My Dad stayed in the room with her right until he passed away.
I enjoy and read several blogs and am on Instagram. I can’t believe how critical and just plain nosy some commenters are. As my mama said, “if you can’t say something nice don’t say anything at all.” God bless you bloggers for not letting that get you down. I am learning how hard you all work. Thank you for your informative information as well as all the eye candy I get to enjoy. I consider you all my friends.
Deborah says
Each of us will have seasons in our lives that are bittersweet and sad but it is a natural part of life. I went through something similar with my mom before she passed. It’s not easy. Unless someone has been through this kind of situation they may not understand. You are so blessed to still have both your parents and they are blessed to have family so close to be there for them.
Margo says
Your parents have been very lucky to have had your help so that they could keep this getaway as long as they did. You are lucky too, to have your parents at this age. My husband and I have lost all four and we are the senior generation at 66 and 67. It is easy to look at someone else and make judgments when you don’t have to do anything. But I know from experience how challenging it is to care for your parent’s home. We had this responsibility for my mom and it was not easy. We miss her all the same. Now, my husband and I are left on our own. Two sons that will not speak to us. We find it amazing that they could have been brought up in a close family where they saw us do so much for our parents and turn out like this. So, enjoy your time with your parents and whatever family you have and don’t give a second thought to any negative comments that come your way.
Cheri says
We have went through and are going through circumstances with aging parent(s) and everyone has different reasons for the choices that are made. Until they can walk a mile in your shoes…..no need for explanations. If this were a perfect world I am sure we (all) would never change a thing or never let our parents live anywhere else but their home
Mary Sturgeon says
Very hard decision but a good one for all. Good memories, not “things”, are important. People get so caught up in the materialistic items and don’t remember what is truly important. Hugs to all.
Judy Gober Clark says
Rhoda,
Such precious memories to look back on with your Dad and Mom. I know that it was a heart rendering thing to sell the house, but it was time. The fact that your Dad was still driving that far to Murphy from their Marietta house concerned me. One less thing to worry about.
I truly understand how hard it is when your loved ones have to make decisions about their future as they age. We went through that with my Daddy. Its gut wrenching! You and your Sister and Lauren have been there for your Dad and Mom which is a wonderful witness to me.
God Bless You Friend!
Judy
Linda Hickey says
Yes I know very well what you are going through. I have lost both my parents years long ago and Mike both of his. There comes a time when your parents can’t do as much as they used to. We went through that and the selling of their hames and getting rid of their personal things. It’s better to sell there other home than try to do it after the are gone. Yes what beautiful memories all of you will always have to cherish in the mountain home. Your parents are very blessed to have a loving family to see after them. Both you and your sister have always been there for them. Love you and your family.
Stacey Keeling says
Rhoda, bless your heart…some of these stages of life are hard! I’m so glad your parents are still with you. Thank heavens for all of the wonderful family memories at the mountain house. What a legacy your parents have created!
Try to brush off the thoughtless comments that some people might make, if you can. It’s always important to remember that we have to walk in each others shoes from time to time to have any idea what it’s like at each stage. We are going through new things with our parents all the time and we just have to go with the flow and do our best to honor them.
Even though giving up the mountain house is tough, I bet your parents are relieved if some ways to have less to care for. Hang in there girl! You have a strong, sweet family
Donna says
Rhoda, you are so blessed to have your parents still with you. Someone’s parents didn’t teach those snarky folks that you say some positive or nothing at all. They had no idea about all the circumstances and besides it’s not their decision. Enough for my Monday morning soapbox….lol! I was always amazed at your dad’s energy at his age. The Urban Farmer and I are twenty years younger and we can barely keep up with our backyard. Thanks for sharing this update and the lovely pictures of your mom and dad.
Linda says
I left a comment …but I don’t see it ?
Rhoda says
I see it Linda, it’s here below.
Roxanne says
Nothing can ever take the wonderful memories out of your heart and mind. But I know how hard it is too having gone through it with my mother when she downsized and then passed away and most recently my mother-in-law. Not having to worry about a second property will be a blessing. For the Negative Nellies, I say shame on them…they do not know you or your family. If they can’t say something nice, they need to keep their thoughts to themselves and pray they don’t find themselves in the same situation. Now you can enjoy your trip, Rhoda, without this hanging over you! 💕
Laura Dennison says
Ah Rhoda,
Well said. These situations are always bittersweet but as you said it is a part of life. It’s such a blessing you still have them both and they are able to be on their own. Thanks for keeping us all in the loop.
Margaret Spain says
❤️