I’ve got some family news to share today and wanted to keep you all in the loop too. I’ve talked about my parents mountain house many many times over the years I’ve been blogging. I’ve shared posts and activities that we have had in that mountain house as a family. Mom and Dad built the house over 30 years ago outside Murphy, NC and it’s been a summer getaway spot for them. They spent so much time up there during summer months and dad planted a huge garden up there every summer as well as his house here in Marietta. Two gardens! If you follow me on Instagram, you saw us up there a couple of Fridays ago for the last time.
It’s a house on 6 acres, with a stream in the front yard and a nice flat area below for his garden. Perfect for them. The last time he planted up there was 2016. In 2017 he was very ill as you all probably remember and his garden that year was very minimal. He planted last year at their Marietta house, but it’s been 3 years since the mountain garden was planted. He dearly loved that plot of ground and it grew some incredible vegetables over the years.
I’ve done several posts on the house and garden, but this one is a good recap on all of it. You can see the home cooked vegetable meals my mom made on this post and there are others linked off it as well.
And here’s another good post on the mountain house, with some of our relatives visiting and a fish fry we had. Such good food and fond memories of this house over the years. If you read those posts, you can really get a feel for what this mountain house has meant to my parents and our entire extended family. It was always their dream to have a house up there in the NC mountains. Our family had vacationed up there for years. My youthful memories are great of the Smoky mountains and much of our extended family spent so much time there as well. Many of our family members have gathered at this house over the years too and we have eaten some good Southern cooking.
So two or 3 years ago, we all began talking about when the time would come that mom and dad would sell the house. As I mentioned, 2016 was the last year dad gardened up there. He had two gardens and at almost 90 at the time, it was too much for him to do both. Mom was ready for him to give it up too (it was a lot of work for her too, with canning and putting up vegetables) and the next year (2017) took care of that, as that’s when he got c-diff and couldn’t do any gardening that year. Thank goodness, he has recovered enough that he grew some things last year and he’s going to plant a few things this year as well, but his strength is waning now and he just can’t do what he’s always done.
That’s his happy place, his garden. I know it’s sad for them to sell this place, but we all agree that it’s time. The time has come that he can no longer keep the house up, keep the grass and brush cut back as it should be and just overall take care of the house. You all know how much upkeep a house and grounds take, especially when you don’t live there full time.
Closing is tomorrow and we will all breathe a sigh of relief to sell the house. The good Lord smiled on them too and the new owners wanted everything in the house as well, including the contents of the basement. That was a relief to mom and really was a relief to us as well. We had talked about having to clean out that house many times and none of us were looking forward to that. So, this was an added bonus and blessing!
The house unfortunately is not worth a lot of money, but the memories left behind are priceless. It’s time to leave it behind. Keeping the house wasn’t an option for me or my sister or Lauren. We all have our own houses and live too far away to take care of another house. Plus, it wasn’t our dream place, but theirs. It took about a year and 1/2 for the house to sell and we are glad it’s finally happening. The new couple that’s buying it will love it, I’m sure.
My sister, brother-in-law, and I went up with mom and dad a couple of weeks ago to pick up their personal belongings. That swing and rocking chair came home with them. Lauren is getting the swing. It was a gift from my dad’s church congregation and it’s a good one. The rocking chair is a Brumby rocker, famous in these parts. Lauren is going to hang the swing in her backyard cabana in Louisiana.
We walked around and helped mom pack up clothes and personal items to bring home. Thank goodness we didn’t have to go through everything. She was so happy about that! They don’t need a thing from this house, as their Marietta house is full too. They have all they need here.
The welcome signs will be left behind.
Dad was feeling a little sad, I know, but he handled it well. He can’t do a lot these days as far as moving boxes and all, so we did it for him. He’s not nearly as strong as he was before he got sick.
Packing up clothes to bring home. We were just talking yesterday about how nice it will be to not have to worry about the house anymore. Mom will be glad especially as she handles most of the bills and anything to do with running the house. No more filling up the natural gas tank, worrying about upkeep on the house, or paying property taxes every year. That adds up too.
I snapped a few pics around the house as we went through, things that have been in the house for so long.
I found a Jadeite bowl and brought it home. One of mom’s longtime collection.
I snapped one more pic of mom and dad to document the last day as we locked the doors and came back home. Closing is tomorrow and that will mark the end of this chapter for the mountain house.
We met up with my cousin who lives up there for lunch and I caught dad in a laughing moment. They have spent so much time up here over the years, but I know it will be a relief as well as sad to bring this to a close.
I thought you all would like to know this news too since I’ve shared that house so much over my blogging life. Life changes and evolves and this is one of those changes for our family. It’s sad, but necessary and we all know that. It’s just another reminder that life is short and we better enjoy it while we have it. Don’t take those days and moments for granted. Every day is precious and one day we will look back and remember the good ole’ days for what they were.
Every family goes thru this process. Aging parents, selling property and figuring out what’s next. We hope our parents can just stay in their current home for the rest of their lives. That would be our wish, but of course we don’t know what the future holds. They are still doing pretty well on their own and we are close by if they need us.
Have you all gone through this too in your family? I am sure many of you have. It’s a part of life and things that we all have to deal with. Life is precious and full of good memories. Hold on to all of them! When I posted on Instagram and Facebook while were were up there that day going through this day,
I did have a couple of comments on Facebook that were rather unnecessary. Something to the effect that it’s just too bad that children take over and make their parents sell homes and do things they don’t want to do. And why isn’t this house staying in the family? Comments to that effect. I did respond back to them that we all have homes of our own, we live too far away to keep the house and besides, it’s not our dream place to have, so it was time to sell. When folks can’t take care of a house any longer, nor can family members take care of it, it’s time to go. We will have no regrets about selling the house and leaving it behind. The memories will always be in our hearts though! Can’t take that away!
just another ‘new normal’….happy to see pictures of your father looking sooo well…a year or so ago, I was scared…
I always find it amazing that people know ahead of time exactly what
they” would do. My Mama and Daddy were able to stay in their home until their deaths–we had to help and I’m sure some people wondered what in the world we were doing letting them stay, but we made it work and they were happy until the end. The people closest to the situation are the ones who have to make those decisions and we just do the best we can. The love you all have for your parents shows through your posts and pictures–thank you for that example for so many. Give them an extra big squeeze from me the next time you see them–I so wish I could hug mine everyday.
Rhoda, thanks for sharing about your parents’ mountain home. I loved looking back at previous blog posts about your fun family times there! Your mom is like mine….both wonderful southern cooks! I loved that great big garden your dad had…he must have been in his element growing such beautiful produce and sharing it with you all. It was a lovely place for your folks to have, and, as you said, many happy family memories were made there. As difficult as the decision must have been to sell, I’m proud of you and your sister and niece for realizing the mountain home was your parents’ dream home, but not yours, and the time had come to let another family love it and make happy memories there. Too often, I would imagine, we hold on to places because of sentimental memories, yet the ensuing upkeep and financial burdens can limit what you want to do, and can turn into resentment when you want to vacation somewhere else, but “must” go up there to take care of things. A second home is wonderful if you can spend a lot of time there, but can be such a burden if you can’t…ignore the comments from people who just don’t get it….sometimes they have to have a little more life experience in order to understand. Thanks, again, for sharing your wonderful family with all of us!
What a relief to your parents and to you ‘girls.’ Better to get all that taken care of now before you are forced to do the job – and pushed into a corner. We hated selling our parents’ home – but Dad was in a nursing home almost three years – and thankfully we had the cash from the sale of the house to provide him with a secure place to live and round the clock nursing care. You are wise to ignore unkind comments from jealous people who wish they had the luxury of having parents who lived into their 90’s. Bitterness is a hard pill for some folks to swallow. God bless you and your parents and your extended family as you continue to move towards the homecoming that awaits all followers of Christ!
I’m happy it has worked out for your mom and dad. I do enjoy reading about them. And yes, the last few years have gone through many things with family. We have lost my mom and my FIL and my MIL had a scare herself and now my dad is in ill health. It’s the circle of life. I am more of a private person and would never be able to share personal details online. Not saying anyone is wrong for that, it’s just me. But it does open yourself up for those who may leave unkind comments. I would just ignore them.
I wish your parents the best! Look forward to hearing about your dad’s garden this year.
On gosh, this is sad but what great memories they have. I remember when my step mom and dad had to move out of their home and into independent living and now my dad is in assisted living, my step mom no longer with us. My dad talks about moving back to his house once in awhile, that makes me sad. Part of life I guess. Now about Facebook, this is a big reason why I am not on there, ha. I wish your parents luck and I hope they can stay in their home. Thanks for letting us know.
My parents are now 85 & 80 and this weekend I helped move them to a one story 2 bedroom accessible home . It will be much easier for them to move about and keep. It’s in a subdivision with many of their friends. They are happy to be there, but figuring out what to do with what seems like 50 pictures, mirrors, extra couches, beds, and all the clothes long ago stuffed back in every closet, well, it’s a bit overwhelming. And it’s tough for mom to let go of items. We divided up what we can, but most have our own full houses and are looking at downsizing ourselves, and our kids are not quite in their own spaces to want/need anything. It’s tough, but we are also thankful that they can still live on their own and will be in a much safer environment and just a few doors from many friends.
Thank you for sharing your family with us. Long time follower and it’s no one business if you sell the mountain home. Do what is best for your family. No judgement here.
I know your folks will miss their dream cabin though I wonder if it might be a bit of relief to them, also, not having the necessary work involved in maintaining it. So many people never make it to their ages and here they are still steaming along doing the things they enjoy albeit on a smaller scale. I know for sure that they enjoy having their girls close by and in their lives. Y’all are their greatest blessings.
Thank you so much for sharing your family with us. My eyes may have overflowed reading this post, as it brought back memories of an almost identical situation for our family…a family cottage on a lake that held so many wonderful family memories. Building that cottage was a healing process as we built it in a very dark time in our lives. My parents made the decision to sell it while they were both in sound minds. They realized they could no longer keep it up and we were scattered about and unable to keep it up either. The new owners also bought the contents and yes, what a relief not to have to worry about that. I have followed you since you started blogging and have so enjoyed the posts about your parents. My parents were both in their 90’s when they went on and they had a wonderful life together. I pray for continued health and happiness for yours.
Hi Rhoda
The memories you have are as you said priceless. Don’t pay attention to people who question decisions that they have no idea about. Every situation is different. We just recently went through the death of my Mother-in-law at 93. She has property in West VA that the family will be selling. Some may wonder why no one wants to hold on to it but it is the same situation. Everyone has their own homes and don’t want the responsibility of a 2nd home. I am glad your parents were able the make the decision to sell the home now. I am sure it was hard but also a relief. Thanks for sharing.
Awww, I didn’t even know the mountain house was for sale, but what a relief for everyone to get it sold and with everything in it! Such a blessing. I know this will make life much easier for all. Like everyone is saying, it’s the circle of life and has to be done. My mom is 87 and my MIL and FIL are 89 & 90, both living in their homes they have been in since the 1970’s and we are thankful….
I always love reading about your parents and seeing pictures of them. We have already been through this process with my husband’s parents, many years ago…they were much older than mine. Friends couldn’t understand why we sold both houses at the beach instead of keeping them. While this wasn’t the case for you, his two older sisters just wanted to used the houses and not pay for anything. So my husband being the son and lawyer of the family had to make that hard decision with his mother. It wasn’t our friends business why we would “give up” two houses at the beach, but I do understand their thoughts. Nor is it your followers business why y’all did what you did. Most of us do the best we can with what we have to work with. You are kind to share. My parents have passed away over the past 3 years and so many extended family members couldn’t understand why we donated most of their things. My sister and I kept the personal “memory maker things”, but their taste wasn’t ours. Enjoy this less stressful time as I’m sure you are. Thank you for sharing and for letting me ramble.
Rhoda, God has truly blessed your family. The memories of the mountain house will always be with you and hopefully be a reminder of how important it is to unplug and appreciate God’s gifts. Simpler times when people had conversations and before hateful internet trolls!
My love to you, at this tender time. You are a wonderful daughter to your dear parents. Thank you for sharing them with us. God bless you all.
Rhoda,
I know how bittersweet this day was for your parents, you girls and your families but in many ways I know its a relief and burden off your parents at their age. I am 60 and my hubby 65 and we find it hard enough to maintain just one home! I wish folks wouldn’t use social media to judge and make negative comments about a situation when they don’t know all the facts.
My father in law who lives in another state is almost 90 and has mobility and health issues. He told my husband recently he needed his help in selling his home and finding a senior apt. We went down there and he had changed his mind and said he wasn’t ready. My husband didn’t push the issue because he wants it to be his decision but we know sooner or later (more sooner) he probably wont have a choice because he had several falls lately. He has a older camper trailer that he hasn’t used in years just sitting in the yard and said he wanted to get rid of. My husband went and got the number of a camper/RV place who sells on consignments and my FIL was all for it. The next day he had changed his mind on that too! So thankfully, your parents are not like this and realize the time is now.
You have honored your parents well, cared for them lovingly and I’ve no sense that they are being “forced to sell their loved mountain home.” They sound like a couple who is bravely facing the realities of life as it winds down….one of the best gifts we can all learn from. Life doesn’t stand still. Bless your dear parents and family.
I don’t know how your Dad worked two gardens! We’re 30 years younger and we planted about 50 plants this weekend and it killed us! I only can marinara and pepper jelly and it’s a lot of work. I can’t imagine canning all the vegetables they grow.
We moved my Mom from a house, to a mobil home, to a Senior Living apartment over the last 10 years and when she passed last year it was still shocking how much ‘stuff’ she still had. How fortunate the buyers wanted all the contents to the Mountain house. I helped with an estate sale a while back and it made me realize I didn’t need half the ‘stuff’ I had been hanging onto. I haven’t missed a single thing I’ve donated in the last year.
Renee,
Your comment was so familiar. My Mother in law passed away 2 years ago and lived in a small one bedroom senior apt. When my husband, sister in law and I cleaned out her apt. we couldn’t believe how much stuff was in there! It was a real shocker to us as well.
I tell you it motivated me when I got back home to de-clutter and get rid of a lot of stuff I no longer used or needed. I put many things in consignment and other things I donated and like you I haven’t missed a single thing and I feel better knowing someone else wont have to deal with it.
I just sold our family farm a year after my sisters sudden death. She stayed on after my parents died and we hoped to have a place to pass on to grandchildren. We all struggled with having to sell but I realized that the land doesn’t mean as much after the people you love have gone. It needed a lot of work to maintain and we could not do that ourselves. It is better to sell to someone who can love it and take care of it much better than we could. I miss it terribly but I am at peace. Your parents remind me of mine with the gardening and all. They are precious.
I think it’s wonderful that you share so much of your heart here, I appreciate all that you share. So much in life is hard and beautiful all wrapped in one messy ball. Thank you for sharing yours! And shame on people want to hurt or shame you! We know they are the truly unhappy people who need our pity. Once again thanks for opening your life and and your heart!